You know those wax pads? Well this is the alternative to that phony shit. if you wax your balls with this stuff, people will hear your scream from a couple miles away...but at least there is no more ball hair!
mom: *looks in cabinet for waxing pads, cant find any
mom: shit, well at least i got flex tape.
son:* sleeping peacefully in bedroom until being woken up by hearing his mom yell in pain from downstairs bathroom.
mom: shit, well at least i got flex tape.
son:* sleeping peacefully in bedroom until being woken up by hearing his mom yell in pain from downstairs bathroom.
by bobo_the_hobo6 January 31, 2019
Get the flex tapemug. While often used derogatorily against others as an accusation of hyper masculine overcompensation, when used in the first person it indicates a willingness to forcibly overcome an overwhelming challenge or highly favored opponent through the use of ones ego.
Mike always trying to flex nuts around school but nobody scared.
Don't matter how many friends you bring, your whole little Gaggle of followers can eat shit. I flex nuts son. Come at me.
Don't matter how many friends you bring, your whole little Gaggle of followers can eat shit. I flex nuts son. Come at me.
by Joshamaphone July 29, 2023
Get the Flex nutsmug. flex tape is basically the only thing able to keep your ass from tearing during those hot, sweaty nights that you decided that getting butt fucked by Thanos was a good idea. And don’t get me wrong, Thanos will make passionate love to you and will do it well, but not even his gauntlet can stop you from almost getting split into to by his massive purple cock. Only flex tape can.
person 1: my marriage is falling apart. my kids have aids. i’m being evicted in 34 minutes. please god, I can’t do this alone. help. me.
god: sorry bro, i’ve got my hands tied. looks like you’re just—
*an explosion destroys the side of the church. a figure walks through the smoke. it’s phil swift*
phil swift: Hi, Phil Swift here with Flex Tape! The super-strong waterproof tape! That can instantly patch, bond, seal, and repair! Flex tape is no ordinary tape; its triple thick adhesive virtually welds itself to the surface, instantly stopping the toughest leaks. Leaky pipes can cause major damage, but Flex Tape grips on tight and bonds instantly! Plus, Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive is so strong, it even works underwater! Now you can repair leaks in pools and spas in water without draining them! Flex Tape is perfect for marine, campers and RVs! Flex Tape is super strong, and once it's on, it holds on tight! And for emergency auto repair, Flex Tape keeps its grip, even in the toughest conditions! Big storms can cause big damage, but Flex Tape comes super wide, so you can easily patch large holes. To show the power of Flex Tape, I sawed this boat in half! And repaired it with only Flex Tape! Not only does Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong water tight seal, so the inside is completly dry! Yee-doggy! Just cut, peel, stick and seal! Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!
god: sorry bro, i’ve got my hands tied. looks like you’re just—
*an explosion destroys the side of the church. a figure walks through the smoke. it’s phil swift*
phil swift: Hi, Phil Swift here with Flex Tape! The super-strong waterproof tape! That can instantly patch, bond, seal, and repair! Flex tape is no ordinary tape; its triple thick adhesive virtually welds itself to the surface, instantly stopping the toughest leaks. Leaky pipes can cause major damage, but Flex Tape grips on tight and bonds instantly! Plus, Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive is so strong, it even works underwater! Now you can repair leaks in pools and spas in water without draining them! Flex Tape is perfect for marine, campers and RVs! Flex Tape is super strong, and once it's on, it holds on tight! And for emergency auto repair, Flex Tape keeps its grip, even in the toughest conditions! Big storms can cause big damage, but Flex Tape comes super wide, so you can easily patch large holes. To show the power of Flex Tape, I sawed this boat in half! And repaired it with only Flex Tape! Not only does Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong water tight seal, so the inside is completly dry! Yee-doggy! Just cut, peel, stick and seal! Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!
by depressed as actual f u c k February 22, 2019
Get the Flex Tapemug. This guy was totally flex-texting me! Talking about business he owns(works for uncle), car he owns(belongs to baby momma) etc
by therealtriciaj July 28, 2015
Get the flex-textingmug. by MacyLynn October 2, 2011
Get the flexing the rulermug. The kid just flexed like a monkey stole the ball at impossible angles .Yeah he's going crazy like ivar the boneless doing a monkey flex.
by Lmwaoelvis September 15, 2023
Get the Monkey flexmug. Somethings is a flex when it’s cool/prestigious to have, cool to have done, or just cool/prestigious.
Ex: buying a million dollars house at 20 is a flex.
by Benz’O July 5, 2022
Get the Flexmug.