jizz bed

The bed in which one jizzes upon their partner, or has their partner jizz upon them.

Guy A: Last night my girlfriend totally ruined my bed sheets.

Guy B: Oh yeah, looks like you got a jizz bed!

by Andrea Sheikha June 29, 2011

Bed paralysis

The inability (if only psychosomatically) to move after experiencing a state of fatigue through the day.

“Laura isn’t going to be joining us, she has bed paralysis.”

by Saph-69 September 11, 2021

Bed Strength

1: When you are so weak, it's as if you have just woken up moments before.
2: When you are sexually fit.

Guy 1: Hey man, can you help me with this couch?
Guy 2: Sorry man, I can't right now, I'm having some serious issues with some bed strength right now.

by spike117 February 24, 2012

Bed shuffle

The little dance you do when you first get into bed and its freezing cold and you need to warm your spot up.

It was so cold last night I must have done and 5 min bed shuffle

by Emnor January 22, 2016

dirty bed

Commonly referred to when an over weight male has a weak boner and is then sat on by his fat wife in bed. This causes him to take a giant shit from the excitement, resulting in a duo of snow angle activity in the pile of excess body fluids.

I was in the middle of a porn video, when my grandmother called me asking if i could wipe her ass cause she's so fat she can't reach around. My wife Judy jumped on my 2 inch junk, causing an instant dirty bed.

by MethDuck February 21, 2014

Bed knight

A person who prefers giving sexual pleasure during intercourse. Pairs with pillow princess/prince.

A pillow princess like Caroline needs a bed knight like Ray.

by Canela 61 August 12, 2022

crumbs on the bed

1:

A minor inconvenience that shall hinder your day/night until it is fixed

2:

literally crumbs on the bed

1:
Person 1: ugh its a crumbs on the bed day
Person 2: ughhhhh

2:
Person 1: I have crumbs on my bed
Person 2: damn man that sucks
Person 3: that'd explain where my weed poptart went
Person 1: YOUR WHAT

by WrenFloof#0666 April 18, 2022