by noncinator70 October 27, 2021
by pqoqogc October 11, 2019
Can apply to two related groups.
1. Parent of a child who needs to get said child into a Catholic School. This parent and or parents haven't been to mass in at least a decade, Christmas doesn't count. They definitely have no interest in their child being indoctrinated by the clergy but need a good school for their child. Most common in the Republic of Ireland as 90% of the schools are controlled by the Vatican and you aren't getting your child enrolled with a Baptismal Cert. Can also apply to parents within the feeder area for a good Catholic school anywhere on earth.
2. A child that has been baptised to have the paperwork to get into a Catholic School. Has only been in a Roman Catholic Church once and that was for the Baptism.
1. Parent of a child who needs to get said child into a Catholic School. This parent and or parents haven't been to mass in at least a decade, Christmas doesn't count. They definitely have no interest in their child being indoctrinated by the clergy but need a good school for their child. Most common in the Republic of Ireland as 90% of the schools are controlled by the Vatican and you aren't getting your child enrolled with a Baptismal Cert. Can also apply to parents within the feeder area for a good Catholic school anywhere on earth.
2. A child that has been baptised to have the paperwork to get into a Catholic School. Has only been in a Roman Catholic Church once and that was for the Baptism.
Brian: "There goes Maeve Brannigan, she was only baptised last week, first time I've ever seen her in a church. 4 years old is late for baptism!
Anne:" Her parents couldn't get into St. Patrick of the Immaculate Conception without the Baptismal Cert. They've joined the 'Catholic for Convenience' Club, we'll see them in mass next at Maeve's First Communion. Can't say I blame them! It was an administrative decision!
Anne:" Her parents couldn't get into St. Patrick of the Immaculate Conception without the Baptismal Cert. They've joined the 'Catholic for Convenience' Club, we'll see them in mass next at Maeve's First Communion. Can't say I blame them! It was an administrative decision!
by Catholic For Convenience Dad December 18, 2021
A Catholic high school in Preston that is filled to the brim with the two N's (Nonces and Narcs) it's staff is likely under trained it is hell on earth if you were thinking of going how about instead shoving a ten foot tall spike up your arse until it bursts out of your head my head of year started shipping me with some boys (even tho I'm a lesbian) and they clearly don't know how to treat children you can never take off your jumper (even after school(I am not even kidding they wait outside Paris and shops and stuff and watch you so you have to keep it on it doesn't matter how hot it is)) unless summer uniform is called this is the worst school I could think of. Another thing about this school is you get referred for showing any emotion e.g I got referred for crying once they are well strict on gum and chewing gum I hate it there so if you're thinking of going please for your safety and mental stability please just don't go there
Jacob: why tf do you still have your school jumper on its 30°c
Anna: I go to Our Lady's Catholic High School (OLCHS) so the teachers are waiting outside the park and watching us so I can't break any of the school rules including the strict uniform policy
Jacob: that's bullshit they can't do that. What about human rights.
Anna: they don't fucking care they also take away freedom of speech so yeah
Jacob: that has to be illegal
Anna: I go to Our Lady's Catholic High School (OLCHS) so the teachers are waiting outside the park and watching us so I can't break any of the school rules including the strict uniform policy
Jacob: that's bullshit they can't do that. What about human rights.
Anna: they don't fucking care they also take away freedom of speech so yeah
Jacob: that has to be illegal
by A.s.n.h.n.a.a.w. May 25, 2025
The ridiculously unnatural contortion of the body, commonly witnessed during films involving demonic possesion or Catholic exorcisms.
"The demon possessed girl was nearly finished with a game of Catholic Twister by the time the priest arrived."
by ChasetheInferno January 11, 2012
Things You Should Never Say To a Catholic Mom:
1. I'm sure your son will want to play with my Catholic toys.
Why it's offensive: Because your own little boy may never be Catholic, so you wouldn't understand. You don't know our secret, so don't even attempt to claim that you know our boys' favorite toys!
2. My kid is becoming more Catholic every day!
Why it's offensive: My child is not "becoming Catholic." Only Mother Theresa or Mother Teresa could speak to my child on a personal level.
3. Would you like to see the priest today?
Why it's offensive: Why would I want to see a priest? My Catholic faith is personal, and my son is not ready to go around asking people to make promises they can't keep. He is more concerned with driving cars, playing with animals, or his chicken.
4. My daughter is becoming more Catholic every day!
Why it's offensive: Because she is not. She is just my daughter. It is highly offensive to suggest that she is "becoming Catholic" because you don't know our secret.
5. My child does not understand Catholic prayers.
Why it's offensive: Do you understand what the F-word means? Do you know how to use a bedpan? Do you speak to your toddler like that?
1. I'm sure your son will want to play with my Catholic toys.
Why it's offensive: Because your own little boy may never be Catholic, so you wouldn't understand. You don't know our secret, so don't even attempt to claim that you know our boys' favorite toys!
2. My kid is becoming more Catholic every day!
Why it's offensive: My child is not "becoming Catholic." Only Mother Theresa or Mother Teresa could speak to my child on a personal level.
3. Would you like to see the priest today?
Why it's offensive: Why would I want to see a priest? My Catholic faith is personal, and my son is not ready to go around asking people to make promises they can't keep. He is more concerned with driving cars, playing with animals, or his chicken.
4. My daughter is becoming more Catholic every day!
Why it's offensive: Because she is not. She is just my daughter. It is highly offensive to suggest that she is "becoming Catholic" because you don't know our secret.
5. My child does not understand Catholic prayers.
Why it's offensive: Do you understand what the F-word means? Do you know how to use a bedpan? Do you speak to your toddler like that?
6. I don't know why people are so judgmental.
Why it's offensive: Because you've never heard me getting on the phone with the delivery guy at Dominick's for 10 minutes because our cat didn't get her salad order right. It's called Motherhood, folks!
7. My son's Catholic school is making him go to mass.
Why it's offensive: Because your son's Catholic school is making you get him out of bed in the morning, make him go to mass, force him to participate in the sacraments, and make him listen to anything other than rap or country music for four hours.
8. I can't believe you'd let your kid go to that Catholic school!
Why it's offensive: You're not going to stop your child from going to public school, so why are you so concerned with mine?
9. My child is coming home with art projects. You know, the kind of stuff a nun wouldn't appreciate.
Why it's offensive: Because you're assuming that all art projects made by little boys are rough, violent, and inappropriately sexual. You know nothing about art, you fruitcake.
10. I'm not Catholic, so I don't need to send my child to Catholic school.
Why it's offensive: You're not Catholic, either! So how dare you criticize my choices? Who do you think you are?
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(This article was originally published at Catholic Mom.)
Why it's offensive: Because you've never heard me getting on the phone with the delivery guy at Dominick's for 10 minutes because our cat didn't get her salad order right. It's called Motherhood, folks!
7. My son's Catholic school is making him go to mass.
Why it's offensive: Because your son's Catholic school is making you get him out of bed in the morning, make him go to mass, force him to participate in the sacraments, and make him listen to anything other than rap or country music for four hours.
8. I can't believe you'd let your kid go to that Catholic school!
Why it's offensive: You're not going to stop your child from going to public school, so why are you so concerned with mine?
9. My child is coming home with art projects. You know, the kind of stuff a nun wouldn't appreciate.
Why it's offensive: Because you're assuming that all art projects made by little boys are rough, violent, and inappropriately sexual. You know nothing about art, you fruitcake.
10. I'm not Catholic, so I don't need to send my child to Catholic school.
Why it's offensive: You're not Catholic, either! So how dare you criticize my choices? Who do you think you are?
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(This article was originally published at Catholic Mom.)
by Drapen November 20, 2022