Hank Boontz

The largest lumberjack, this side of the Mississippi. He can wrestle 3 bears with one hand behind is back.

Hank hasn't spoken to his children in over 15 years. He doesn't pay child support.

Hank lives in a cabin in North Minnesota, where he lives with four squirrels. There were originally 5, but there was a fatality, during a thumb wrestling match. Rest In Peace, poor Billy.

Hank has a robust collection of flannel shirts. Used to model for Black and Decker.

Member of the Dean Koontz Family Tree.

Squirrel 1: Hank Boontz, don't do it!

Hank: He shouldn't of disrespected me.

Squirrel 2: Hank, I don't think he knew that was your wife's closet.

Squirrel 5: I'm sorry! I won't do it again!

Hank: Challenge me to a thumb wrestling match for your life.

Splonald, from out of the corner: Did you guys remember to pick up cheese?

Squirrel 4: Yea, I got it.

Splonald: Thanks. *relinquishes back to the corner*

Squirrel 5: Tell your wife those acorns aren't for her. And those were the only nuts I was talking about busting in your wife's closet.

Hank after landing the final blow on Squirrel 5: Well shit, this is awkward.

Squirrel 3: THAT'S A LOT OF NUTS!

by Hank Boontz May 4, 2021

bass boost

that one time when you have a speaker at a family gathering and this plays “NUMBER 1 VICTORY ROYALE YEA FORTNITE WE ABOUT TO GET DOWN”

oh my god a speaker… time to bass boost? i guess “searches up (sussy clapping noises on youtube)”

by monke or crab October 10, 2021

Stat-Boost

a stat-boost is something you say or do improve yourself and/or make yourself feel happier

I was depressed so I thought about my favorite actor for a quick stat-boost and then I felt better

by safsfaaaa May 22, 2022

Biscuit Boost

An SMS boost of over 100 at a time, leading to inbound taking a fist up the arse.

James: Prepare your anuses, we just got biscuit boosted.
Steve: All back on inbound defend the ship!
Mabz: I'll be there just finishing off this homeless guy on my way in
Gill: More than 4!

by Ablemoss June 23, 2022

Self-boost

When you like, share, or follow your own things to boost your popularity.

People self-boost on tiktok mostly.

by .unl0ded_3rror May 27, 2023

Monivong Boonsook

The act of defecating in a sexual partners hands, that feces is then used as lubrication to perform masturbation on the defecating party, the performing party then proceeds to begin to fellate the defecator until ejaculation is achieved.

Did you hear? Gerald took that dirty bitch Kayla out back and she gave him the ol' Monivong Boonsook she came out with a skid mark on her chin and he didn't even wipe afterward!

by Cornelius J Wunderwalt December 31, 2023

Gleam Boost Day

The best thing to happen to loomian legacy.
Nothing will top this.
Even if Armenti gives out his entire collection still won't top this.
Also shortened to GBD
Would sadly never happen again
Happened on December 9, 2023 at Haunted Village

Person1: Bro did you prepare for Gleam Boost Day yet?
Friend of Person1: we are getting a gbd???
Person1: Do it right now!1!1!1!!11!!!111

by Noples! January 4, 2024