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no offence

What you say right before offending someone.
No offence, but your hear looks like sh*t.
by bamboomy January 15, 2011
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The Cleavage Offence

Often seen in in play by female receptionists when a man arrives at the desk with the intention of engaging in an appropriate and innocent busness-like interaction.

She exaggeratedy places the palm of her hand on her chin and her elbow on the desk blatantly drawing attention to the act of her covering her cleavage from view with her forearm.

Frequently accompanied by chewing or staring with a raised eyebrow and one side of the mouth curled up in dusgust.

Usually carried out by insecure harpies with skin like the armpit on a Hell's Angel's beaten leather jacket.

Not to be confused with:
The Cleavage Defence.
Justin: "Hi, I'm here to see. . .errr"
Receptionist: Chew, chew, chew, 'siiiiighhhhhh. . .'
Justin: ". . . err, your CEO. I'm errr, a VP at Intel Labs."
Receptionist: "Have a seat then. 'Sigh'. . . "
Joseph: "Haha Justin, you just got totally busted checking out her rack!"
Justin: "No way man! She totally wrong-footed me with The Cleavage offence. No really. She so did dude!!"
Joseph: "Phhhttt. Sure. whatever."
by GabrielDertzer September 30, 2010
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Gender-offended

The affronted emotion one experiences when one is mistakenly labeled as someone of the opposite sex.
Bob: "Alright, guys! Let's go!"
Melissa: "Excuse me! Do I LOOK like a guy to you? No, don't answer that. I feel so gender-offended..."
by Death of Marat June 20, 2011
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offence

Retard: "Hey, no offence but-"
Me: "*smacks*"
by pshsocoolerthanyou February 6, 2008
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the easily offended

A quote by Machiavelli. What it really means is it is not necessary to feel at a loss when forced to suffer the presence of those who are easily offended. Because those who are easily offended are also easily manipulated.
Feminist: How could you not know women only make 77 cents on the dollar compared to men? Are you stupid or something? You gutless male swine!
Me: Forgive me madam, I'm just not as well versed in economics as someone with a gender studies degree.
Feminist: Oh I'm sorry, it's just that I get kinda angry sometimes!
Me: No worries, what you say sounds so complex it goes over my head. My friend Steve on the other hand, well, he's always making misogynistic jokes I'm sure he could benefit from your insight.
Feminist: Where is he?The bastard!!
Me thinking: (Hmm, the easily offended...)
by Lam Alien January 31, 2017
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offended cunt

A phrase used to describe someone who get easily offended at things most people laugh at. This can be from a harmless joke to saying that gingers shouldn't be allowed on public transport.
Dave: I've got a joke to tell margaret.
Brad: I wouldn't. she is quite the offended cunt.
by jparmo12321 August 3, 2018
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No offence

No offence, often said before or after a rude sentence. Basically, saying no offence doesn't help the matter at all.
Tom: Dude, no offence but, you're really weird
Jake: Thanks dude :(
by wheretheavocadosat April 12, 2019
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