A tiny British-accented robot that becomes corrupted when put in GLaDOS's body and becomes very selfish. You can meet him in Portal 2 in Finale 4 and him in space is his last appearance shown in-game.
by layo the layo February 5, 2026
Get the Wheatley mug.I closed my eyes.
I found you at the door of a white house.
I knew it was a lucid dream.
You took my right hand.
We went inside.
There were different people in the house.
You would stop and talk to each of them,
but our hands never separated,
not even for a moment.
My eyes caught the carpeted stairs.
I was waiting for you to finish talking
so we could go upstairs.
But I woke up.
I was always curious about what was up there.
When I saw the first visions,
another door opened for me.
I sat in meditation,
hoping to see
what awaited at the top of the stairs.
I saw it.
There were more stairs,
suspended in space.
This time, I was alone.
You were at the top of the stairs,
standing beside a door.
I climbed those stairs a thousand times,
but before reaching the top,
I would fall asleep—
because climbing them was deeply soothing.
Finally,
one day,
I reached the top.
I had always thought
that if I opened the door,
a hidden green garden would be behind it.
The door opened.
It was a wheat field,
with a single tree.
maybe the nearest wheat fields
to the stone coastal village—
the same place
where we reached peace,
in each other’s arms.
I found you at the door of a white house.
I knew it was a lucid dream.
You took my right hand.
We went inside.
There were different people in the house.
You would stop and talk to each of them,
but our hands never separated,
not even for a moment.
My eyes caught the carpeted stairs.
I was waiting for you to finish talking
so we could go upstairs.
But I woke up.
I was always curious about what was up there.
When I saw the first visions,
another door opened for me.
I sat in meditation,
hoping to see
what awaited at the top of the stairs.
I saw it.
There were more stairs,
suspended in space.
This time, I was alone.
You were at the top of the stairs,
standing beside a door.
I climbed those stairs a thousand times,
but before reaching the top,
I would fall asleep—
because climbing them was deeply soothing.
Finally,
one day,
I reached the top.
I had always thought
that if I opened the door,
a hidden green garden would be behind it.
The door opened.
It was a wheat field,
with a single tree.
maybe the nearest wheat fields
to the stone coastal village—
the same place
where we reached peace,
in each other’s arms.
by From Saint Agnes to Egypt February 8, 2026
Get the Wheat fields mug.The act of forcefully inserting anything painfully narrow into the urethra, or getting dicked in a way that feels like your piss hole is being industrially sanded. Often mentioned in the same breath as regret, tears, and internal screaming.
by LackOfHats February 24, 2026
Get the Wheat straw spoon mug.Refers to where two mushy-hearted guys wif "different-but-delightful" personalities tenderly cradle a cute chick's ten slender digits between each of theirs at da same time --- i.e., one nice fellow affectionately interlaces his fingers palm-to-palm wif da girl's, and then da other pleasant-mannered dude lays his own hands against da backs of said sweet blinky-eyed damsel's hands and softly folds his own fingers into da mix, as well. Extra points if said two gentle-natured male admirers "split da softness" --- i.e., rather than one fellow's "hogging" both of da girl's warm velvety palms so dat da other guy only gets to touch da backs of her hands, each dude takes one palm and one back of da girl's hands when initially grasping them, so dat both guys get an equal share of "palming" and "spooning".
Employing da wheat-and-rye-bread sandwich-hand-clasp is indeed super-pleasant and satisfying, but you can get even more creative than that... why not try da "poppy-seed-bun hand-clasp" --- i.e., where ya share da girl's hands wif a freckled dude --- or a "wheat-and-Pumpernickel-bread sandwich-hand-clasp", which involves letting an African-American hunk share a little squeezy fingers-'n'-palms fun wif said smiling sweetie-pie, also.
by QuacksO February 23, 2025
Get the wheat-and-rye-bread sandwich-hand-clasp mug.A pizza of any sort- Australian.
by The Camel March 4, 2025
Get the Wheat Slab mug.Did you bring your wheatbran for the party?
it wouldnt be a good picnic with the boys without the Wheatbran!
it wouldnt be a good picnic with the boys without the Wheatbran!
by Doc Orion April 12, 2025
Get the Wheatbran mug.