The most Jared thing a Jared could ever do is be named Jared. They are constantly taking bathroom breaks each one longer then the last. They are experts in the arts of PC building and take pride in the fact that they know how to build a Lego or two (thanks to an engineering background). Expect them to talk about their Linus Tech Tips water bottle every now and then. That is just the Jared way.
by wordsarentreal78 April 12, 2022

“Hey did Joe fax that report over to corporate?”
“I’ll ask him when he comes back. He’s taking a Jared”
“I’ll ask him when he comes back. He’s taking a Jared”
by 3little3series November 5, 2020

The most gracious fingers known to man, known to make any man or woman bust upon sight. These fingers have fueled entire societal movements, and are some of the most significant fingers in history.
by No_Name_Bob December 19, 2022

He is the soulmate to Jasmin and only Jasmin and if you’re not Jasmin then he’s gonna spray you with pepper spray and report you for harassment because he only loves Jasmin and if he cheats on Jasmin he lost such an important person and that’s his loss. He’s so fine and Jasmin and God love him so much.
by ChickFilaALover November 21, 2023

He is Perfection.
by Anonym0us/1786 January 20, 2023

When one turd sucks on another turd for survival in a manner that reflects two turds French kissing.
by GGG Fantasy Football October 22, 2022

Jared is the most amazing boy you will ever meet. He is smart, kind, cute funny, and above all he is such a gentlemen. He will always give you a compliment and is the sweetest person EVER!!!! He will always make you smile and blush. He is super strong and loves to workout. He is a great boyfriend, husband, fiance, etc. If you get a Jared in your life you are or would be extremely lucky I know I am. Jared will support you in whatever you love and will always make you laugh. Jared's are amazing guys and any girl would be lucky to have one.
Girl 1: so who is the special guy?
Girl 2: Jared he is so amazing!!
Girl 1: I love Jared's i wish I had one :(
Girl 2: Jared he is so amazing!!
Girl 1: I love Jared's i wish I had one :(
by cheerleader12 April 9, 2019
