Carpet Muncher

A Carpet muncher is a term used to describe a lesbian woman. It is so named because many lesbian women prefer oral sex in their relationships. They munch (eat out) the carpet ( vagina with pubic hair)
“She’s a complete bitch, why won’t she just date me.”
“ She’s probs a carpet muncher
Fuck My Life
by Geoff Anonymous Man February 11, 2018
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tragic carpet

when someone’s (usually a female’s) carpet or pubic region is not shaven at all, to the point of full bush or shaven very poorly
When I went down on her, her tragic carpet turned me gay and made me miss the homies.
by CEO of BDE June 08, 2020
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junkies carpet

Two stoners sit in their living room for several weeks, smoking doobies and occasionally sampling other recreational drugs. Over time, the carpet will become coated in a layer of different drugs. Bagged and tagged, the pick and mix of junkies carpet is then sold at a low price. The perfect solution to a budget night out... Or night in
I've got a week till payday, looks like I'm on junkies carpet till then
by JohnnyHash January 29, 2019
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Carpet Mafia

Below average girl: so we hooking up for tonight?

Average guy: sorry, I got carpet mafia.. not tonight.
by CharaChan July 10, 2021
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Crusty Carpet

You ejaculate in a girls pubic hair and let it dry out.

She doesnt wash it for a week.
"hey john, hows your wifes pubes?"
"Last night I gave her a crusty carpet"

"YEAH BOOOOIIIIIII"
by Mr. Nips February 02, 2012
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carpet soldier

A man notoriously known to seek out lesbians and convert them into being straight by means of flirting, dating, and/or sex.
Guy 1: Dude, john is such a carpet soldier.
Guy 2: Well you got to give him credit, he's the only man I know who made a lesbian bar close down.
by Alkyd Norm February 27, 2017
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Carpet Massage

When a man uses his hand(s) to please a woman.
Instead of a carpet munching tonight how about just a carpet massage?

A carpet massage a day keeps the bitch away

If you're not ski poling you're carpet massaging
by ldylumps May 10, 2012
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