Vanilla Johnson

The process whereby one man ejaculates on another mans penis. It can be a pure accident of through an act of sexual intercourse.

Man 1: OMG i'm so close!
Man 2: Vanilla Johnson me... do it jizz on my girth!
Man 1: F**k yeah! OMG, OMG this is so hot!
Woman 1: Errr guys what about me?!
Men: Shut it, you bearne'd everywhere!

by Vanilla johnson April 14, 2010

Boris Johnson

is a word that can be used to describe somebody hanging on to something with dear life, especially when everybody concerned wants you to stop, even to go as far as quitting their cushy jobs. furthermore, it is appropriate to use this when the act of hanging on is actively damaging what you are hanging on to, causing festering distrust in that thing and causing shaking laughter from the rest of the entire fucking world.

Steve, she's had 8 kids with barry now, get over it and stop trying to pull them apart by insinuating an affair.
No, cus im Boris johnson

by PiGeOn the BrIt July 10, 2022

Jo Johnson

Legend has it Jo Johnson is walking the earth today. His name holds a precedent of sheer power and top human male physique except for his only downfall, his height, standing 5’5” with a weight of 180lbs which as bad as it seems only makes him more of an absolute tank. He is a myth among plebeian men who try to match his godly power. He is so powerful that all it takes him to destroy anyone is him simply saying his own name. This absolute monolith of a man gets everything he wishes for. If you dare to disobey the man above god he will smite you with his own name. So let it be know that the legend of this absolute unit of a man will destroy everything in his path if he isn’t appeased. Next time you walk down the street and find a short man to bully. Be careful, it might just be him

Plebeian 1: have you heard the myth of the great Jo Johnson

Plebeian 2: yes, yes I have, I follow him religiously yet never come close to his absolute dominance

Jo Johnson: Jo Johnson

Plebeian 1 and plebeian 2: *dies*

by Maugh October 12, 2021

johnson lid

noun: a condom or device placed between penis and the world.

"yo, let me get a johnson lid, i think i'm getting lucky tonight."

by doug p January 14, 2008

Jump-to-it Johnson

Someone who prematurly acts. Usually when the person thinks another individual is done with an object and makes it their own or throws it away(etc.) when in fact the individual was not through using the object.

I would have saved my seat if i knew we had Jump-to-it Johnson over here

by 2knuckleshuffle November 21, 2010

Screaming Johnson

A man who catches a std and his johnson feels on fire. They call it the screaming johnson!

Man poor Joey got a bad case of the screaming johnson!

by Bigracks37 July 2, 2023

Donuts Johnson

When a person remains without a win during any form of competition over a set period of time (day, week, month etc..). Sports, board games etc.. all included.

If a person gets a win during the set time period they are no longer known as Donuts Johnson.

At the start of the next period of time everyone is equal but once a game has been played anyone who has played a game and is without a win is considered a Donuts Johnson.

Hey Ian you still do not have a win this week you are Donuts Johnson.

by Slither13 June 9, 2011