Melted John

Someone who is extremely intoxicated (a Glaswegian slang term)

Oaft I’m absolutely melted John

by danie7smith March 6, 2025

John

It is a Smash Bros slang meaning an excuse.

Guy 1: I win!!
Guy 2: I lost because I lagged!
That is a John.

by RatMan 69420 May 31, 2021

John cena

A invisible man willing to hurt you at any cost

Look it's famous wrestler john cena

by Bob the build 1768 September 26, 2022

John Emery

At totally epic gamer! This is the man you would want on your team. An insane apex legend and a totally rad siege player 😩! This guy will kick names and take ass! Never 1v1 him cuz he’ll destroy you!

Person1: “did you see that guy who killed me!?”

Person2: “bruh that guy was such a John Emery!”

by KidKryptic October 17, 2021

The Shitfaced John

a Rocket Palmer with a minimum of 2 shots of Vodka added to the mix.

this Rocket Palmer sure would be tasty with some Vodka. How about The Shitfaced John?

by masters of mixology September 23, 2011

John Lewis Teaspoon

The term to "John Lewis Teaspoon" someone is to go and purchase a brand new sparkly teaspoon from the local John Lewis store.
The spoon can only be purchased from a John Lewis store and cannot be from any other store.
Once purchased the purchaser uses the teaspoon to remove one eye from the targeted person using only the spoon. After the eye has been removed and only the socket remains, the person with the tea spoon has intercourse with the eye socket of the person lacking the eye.

Person 1 "Glen is such a pain in the arse"

Person 2 " Yeah, if he keeps it up I'm gonna John Lewis Teaspoon him"

Or

Person 1 "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO! IM GONNA JOHN LEWIS TEASPOON THE CRAP OUT OF YOU"

Person 2 "EEEEEK"

by 969-696 February 19, 2024

John moment

this is a term used by people for when someone, preferably by the name of John, says something or posts something that isn’t funny at all. that is when the term is used to show how unfunny your friend John is.

“dude, check this out!!”
*John shows something unfunny*
“wow, that’s an John moment.”

by Johnnotfunny2020 October 5, 2020