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clomb
• clomber
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Michael Curtiz (director of the classic film Casablanca) once was overheard explaining that a Clemb is:
"Like... Bigger than Hitler and Stalin times 4...
... times 5 even...
...maybe."
EDIT: There is a theory that Clemb is actually an acronym for Caucasians Lashed Effectively Minus Bruises. Obviously this affords the slang term an unnerving racial element an in all likelihood this definition is false.
Michael Curtiz (director of the classic film Casablanca) once was overheard explaining that a Clemb is:
"Like... Bigger than Hitler and Stalin times 4...
... times 5 even...
...maybe."
EDIT: There is a theory that Clemb is actually an acronym for Caucasians Lashed Effectively Minus Bruises. Obviously this affords the slang term an unnerving racial element an in all likelihood this definition is false.
Taken from the satirical comedy come rock opera, "Gatz" by Sean MacConreyville.
Overheard in the Ghetto
Jermaine: You have the hallmark traits of the "c" word my friend.
Shaniqua: Are you calling me... Common!?
Jermaine: Dear Lord No! I would never wish that upon my greatest enemies.
Jermaine pauses for a moment before his eyes betray his sudden realization. He continues:
Jermaine: Dear Lord Shaniqua. I dare say that, in my ire, I have discovered a most foul hypocrisy in my attitude.
Shaniqua: I shall let you explain Jermaine (Shaniqua leans back in her chair and chuckles for a bit. She has just realised that she is a poet and that she didn't even know it.)
Jermaine: I must confess, blinded by my fury, I suggested that you had the traits of a Clemb. I then went on to state that I would never wish commonness on even my most hated foes and yet...
Jermaine pauses again, this time with more desperation.
Shaniqua: Or Jerry what is it dear!?
Jermaine (in fits of tears): OH DARLING! A Clemb is a term USED by common folk.
Jermaine continues to cry, the ceaseless flood of tears betraying his regret, Shaniqua holding his limp head up to maintain some of his dignity. Eventually, after much time, he stops and Shaniqua looks at him with a different purpose.
Shaniqua: Jermaine...
Jermaine: Yes Shaniqua?
Shaniqua: Shall we make love? Right here at the dinner table?
Jermaine: No let's not. I have just eaten.
Curtains
Overheard in the Ghetto
Jermaine: You have the hallmark traits of the "c" word my friend.
Shaniqua: Are you calling me... Common!?
Jermaine: Dear Lord No! I would never wish that upon my greatest enemies.
Jermaine pauses for a moment before his eyes betray his sudden realization. He continues:
Jermaine: Dear Lord Shaniqua. I dare say that, in my ire, I have discovered a most foul hypocrisy in my attitude.
Shaniqua: I shall let you explain Jermaine (Shaniqua leans back in her chair and chuckles for a bit. She has just realised that she is a poet and that she didn't even know it.)
Jermaine: I must confess, blinded by my fury, I suggested that you had the traits of a Clemb. I then went on to state that I would never wish commonness on even my most hated foes and yet...
Jermaine pauses again, this time with more desperation.
Shaniqua: Or Jerry what is it dear!?
Jermaine (in fits of tears): OH DARLING! A Clemb is a term USED by common folk.
Jermaine continues to cry, the ceaseless flood of tears betraying his regret, Shaniqua holding his limp head up to maintain some of his dignity. Eventually, after much time, he stops and Shaniqua looks at him with a different purpose.
Shaniqua: Jermaine...
Jermaine: Yes Shaniqua?
Shaniqua: Shall we make love? Right here at the dinner table?
Jermaine: No let's not. I have just eaten.
Curtains
by Those Groobies June 17, 2013
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