When you hire Wayne Gretzky to dunk his penis in a jar of maple syrup and slap you in the face with it.
I couldn't make it to baseball practice yesterday because a session of Canada's History ran a bit late.
by nozavroni February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.This is the most offensive sexual act that has ever been performed in the history of Canada. It involves moose antlers, a gallon of maple syrup, 14.5 people. This makes the "Aristocrats" seem like soft core porn!
Canadian #1 : "Did you hear that the magazine 'The Beaver' is changing its name to 'Canada's History' because of the porn filters on search engines?"
Canadian #2 : "Oh no! Don't they know that 'Canada's History' is a lot worse than 'The Beaver'!!! What have they done!
Canadian #2 : "Oh no! Don't they know that 'Canada's History' is a lot worse than 'The Beaver'!!! What have they done!
by SColbert February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.While having sex during a hockey match, it's the use of the maple syrup to shove a Stanley Cup like object up a woman's anus, while simultaneously being penetrated in the vagina with a penis which is covered in maple syrup. As soon as the male feels he needs to release he pulls out and cums on top of the Stanley Cup and yells Hat Trick!
Stephen: Hey baby, you wanna go pull off Canada's History?
Stephanie: As long as you can score me a Hat Trick.
Stephen: Don't worry, I can.
Stephanie: As long as you can score me a Hat Trick.
Stephen: Don't worry, I can.
by pickemgenius February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.A depraved American sexual act involving moose antlers, maple syrup, and the Stanley Cup.
It's so depraved that it can't be described, even on urban dictionary, as those who may be offended have access to it.
It's so depraved that it can't be described, even on urban dictionary, as those who may be offended have access to it.
"Dude... that chick has no respect for herself- she totally performed Canada's History with me!"
"Woah... You let her? Dude... you have no respect for YOURSELF!!"
"Woah... You let her? Dude... you have no respect for YOURSELF!!"
by thischickoverhere February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.The act of giving oral sex to a moose while simultaneously having the exact number of gallons that can be filled into the Stanley Cup injected into the anal cavity with its left antler. The right antler is simply impossible within the current laws of physics.
by ForsFagerstrom February 25, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.crap history, probably better know to most people as ancient history, is considered to be the most cruel and inhumane form of sadistic psychological torture known to human kind. It was submitted to the Department of Education accidentally and was somehow overlooked and made it's way onto the syllabus.
It is said that ancient history is soo bad that Satan himself rejected it as being used as a form of torture in hell.
Students who choose to take ancient history are immediately blacklisted for the rest of their lives. They are usually semi-illiterate and write on papyrus scrolls instead of pieces of A4 paper. The students also use quills and ink wells and use homing pigeons to send their messages.
People who do ancient history all turn gay, except the girls...who's vagina's invert into penises thus making them men..then they turn gay. ancient history also causes students who do it immense internal trauma that the body becomes overwhelmed and develops another chromosome causing ancient history students to become down syndrome along with gay. The only cure for symptoms of ancient history's plague is to revert back to the elixir, also known as Modern History.
By doing ancient history you automatically fail the hsc........and life in general.
It is said that ancient history is soo bad that Satan himself rejected it as being used as a form of torture in hell.
Students who choose to take ancient history are immediately blacklisted for the rest of their lives. They are usually semi-illiterate and write on papyrus scrolls instead of pieces of A4 paper. The students also use quills and ink wells and use homing pigeons to send their messages.
People who do ancient history all turn gay, except the girls...who's vagina's invert into penises thus making them men..then they turn gay. ancient history also causes students who do it immense internal trauma that the body becomes overwhelmed and develops another chromosome causing ancient history students to become down syndrome along with gay. The only cure for symptoms of ancient history's plague is to revert back to the elixir, also known as Modern History.
By doing ancient history you automatically fail the hsc........and life in general.
Ralph :What subjects are you doing?
Sam: Umm, i picked 12 units of Modern History
Ralph :Me too, what subjects did you pick Miles?
Miles: I chose English, Art, Multimedia, Bio, Maths and ancient history
Ralph: ANCIENT HISTORY!!!! may aswell kill yourself now! Thats the crap history, your not even repping modern you stupid mokes! Go change to modern right now!
Sam: It's already too late, he's already turning gay
Ralph: And down syndrome
Sam: Umm, i picked 12 units of Modern History
Ralph :Me too, what subjects did you pick Miles?
Miles: I chose English, Art, Multimedia, Bio, Maths and ancient history
Ralph: ANCIENT HISTORY!!!! may aswell kill yourself now! Thats the crap history, your not even repping modern you stupid mokes! Go change to modern right now!
Sam: It's already too late, he's already turning gay
Ralph: And down syndrome
by esh diggens January 16, 2009
Get the crap history mug.An incredibly long, drawn-out sexual act involving a man, a woman, their daughter and son, Grandma (it helps if she's from Quebec), the family collie, moose antlers, maple syrup and a piece of hockey equipment from a former Shawinigan Junior-B player named Red Stanley (aka "Stanley's Cup", sometimes misinterpreted as the trophy from a professional hockey league).
While the act itself is far to complex to explain without the use of diagrams, specially modified crash-test dummies and a pie-chart, it can sometimes be seen performed live on stage at an underground nightclub in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan by a local theatre troupe known as "The Aristocrats".
While the act itself is far to complex to explain without the use of diagrams, specially modified crash-test dummies and a pie-chart, it can sometimes be seen performed live on stage at an underground nightclub in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan by a local theatre troupe known as "The Aristocrats".
"Last night's performance of Canada's History was so intense that Grandma's glass-eye wouldn't come back out."
by grapevine1015 February 5, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.