mushroom management

A way to manage tech teams working to an ill-defined task, described by Tracy Kidder as "Keep them in the dark, feed them shit, watch them grow" (in his 1981 title 'The Soul of a New Machine' about the people that built the first minicomputer at Data General).

As long as the outcome remains undefined, there's no way to hold them accountable for whichever result. You'd better apply mushroom management instead.

by Nada Knicks August 5, 2022

Early Grave Management/ E.G.M

E.G.M also know as Early Grave Management was Founded By ( kE & bZ ) YOU PLAY YOU LAY it’s that simple I mean it’s right in the name earl-lee gray-ve man-a-ge-ment

- their names are spelled backwards for the slow ones

Aye boy you heard bout E.G.M ya ass bet not get caught lacking on soul on my kids yo grave gon get managed early - some wise old man

Early Grave Management/ E.G.M

by Some Wise Old Man June 14, 2022

Managering

The act of commanding others to do tasks while you yourself never contribute no matter how easy or hard the task is.

People that are managering also tend to waste more time getting other people to do work than just doing it themselves.

While the term usually applies to actual managers of jobs (hence the name), it can apply to anyone outside the workplace.

Example 1

Employee: You called me over here sir?

Manager: I need you to clean up this spill

Employee: But you are already holding a mop and paper towels. You could have done this yourself much quicker than the time it took me to respond to you. Instead of managering why don't you do some work yourself because I don't see why the company needs someone like you.

Example 2

Mom: Go vacuum the floors they have been filthy all day. It's like you don't ever help around the house.

Child: Mom, I just got home from school, why could you not do it?

Mom: Unlike you I am busy almost all day doing chores and working 8 hour shifts.

Child: Mom, you have been on this couch watching Sex and the City since I left for school and you are still watching it.

Mom: ...

Child: Instead of managering could you help out while I'm busy?

by Clowninator69 June 18, 2022

property manager

The minion to a landlord. Usually an antagonistic go-between placed between the landlord and the people who actually live on site. There are more and more property managers now than there used to now that housing is being gobbled up by private equity (see Blackrock), and that means the absentee landlords are spread pretty thin, so they need to hire a small army of property managers to surveil and dictate the goings-on in each of their rental properties.

"This property manager sucks, she won't return our calls except to yell at us about having guests over."

by Pyro's R Us August 23, 2022

Noah is the best staff manager

The best staff manager that has ever existed

Man Noah is the best staff manager and deserves owner

by Somerandomnamebecausetheothers November 4, 2022

The Manager Room

The secret room in every corporation where managers congregate.

There's a fresh batch of caviar in the manager room!

by public2 November 12, 2022

Ubiquitous fertility management

A term invented by John Kerry and/or Bill Gates to denote 'non white population control'.

According to Kerry and Gates by the mid 21st century there's supposed to be more people in Africa than China and India combined. So they're proposing something called ubiquitous fertility management. I don't know 😕 🤷 why they're doing this.

by Sexydimma November 25, 2022