Jesus

Compassionate, fervent lover, friend of sinners, a shepherd to the lost, Father to the orphan, Healer to the broken, Son of the Living God. Jesus Christ is the only man that took YOUR sin and nailed it to the cross. Sin no longer has a hold on you because of Jesus's sacrifice. Jesus died for you knowing that you might not ever love Him back, but He knew YOU were worth it, so He GLADLY died for you and on the third day, Jesus rose in victory. He is a gentleman, he will not force you to do anything, but nothing you can do will separate you from his all consuming, never ending, LOVE. Jesus is ALIVE. Jesus is GOD.
Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." Luke 23:24
by KAYNICSAN March 01, 2015
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Jesus

1.) "And then, one Thursday, nearly two thousand years after one man had been nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be to be nice to people for a change, a girl sitting on her own in a small café in Rickmansworth suddenly realized what it was that had been going wrong all this time, and she finally knew how the world could be made a good and happy place. This time it was right, it would work, and no one would have to get nailed to anything.
Sadly, however, before she could get to a phone to tell anyone about it, the Earth was unexpectedly demolished to make way for a new hyperspace bypass, and so the idea was lost, seemingly for ever.
This is not her story"

-The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

2.) The person how some people believe existed and was a prophet/demigod. People now run around and kill things because of it for no good reason.
1.) The year 1984 (years after that guy Jesus kicked the bucket)
2.) "In the name of the Lord I will now run my sword though you in an extremly painful way!!!"
by Vishnu II January 01, 2010
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Jesus

God is Jesus.
Jesus is God.
by metalsphere March 21, 2015
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Jesus

by TizzyLiz June 15, 2008
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Jesus

Cannot be used if your mum is very religious
Erin: hey isnt your name pronounced hey-soos

Jesus: no, my mum is very religious

Erin: Wouldnt that have prevented you from having the name Jesus?

Jesus: F*CK!!!!
by Soph_Soph_100 August 15, 2017
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Jesus

Jesus is the type of boy that will cheer up your day in a instant. He’s smart, has a weird sense of humor, cute, and most of all, he’s a wonderful friend. He’s a loyal to all his friends and dates the best girls. Any girl that dates him is lucky af. He’s understanding and supportive. He’s athletic, which is pretty hot. Every girl has a crush on him so ladies, good luck with the competition. He loves soccer, maybe more than he loves his girl... but overall he’s the best person ever!! Anyone who has him is one lucky son of a bitch.
Jesus is so fkn hot 😍
Wow!! Jesus is such an amazing friend

I’d totally smash Jesus 🤤
by 11 May 31, 2018
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Jesus

Jesus is Jesus
Jesus is Jesus
by PapiChampoo January 20, 2016
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