Manlet Detection Agency

The Manlet Detection Agency is a crucial government entity that seeks to, using the long arm of the law, squash the derisory emergence of a pint-sized manlet insurgency. The brave men and women of the Manlet Detection Agency work tirelessly to protect the community from the ever-present threat of a manlet uprising by relentlessly detecting manlets both online and irl. Suspected manlets are detained and then searched and stripped of any contraband like height boosting insoles and high heels. Subsequently the potential Little Criminals are meticulously measured and, if confirmed to be shorter than 5ft10 and therefore a soon-to-be prison wife manlet, the stunted manlets are arrested on the spot. Every lacking inch below 5ft10 is known to be reflected by an additional ten-year prison term in the girlish manlet's well-deserved sentence, which will be imposed upon the puny manlet by a fuming judge as the microscopic manlet boy stands small in a courtroom atop of his towering attorney's outstretched palm securely shackled by a string of dental floss.
Hey, isn't that the minuscule turbo-manlet Kevin Hart getting hemmed up by a heroic group of mobile task force agents from the Manlet Detection Agency? It sure is. That diminutively petite and astronomically effeminate sissy manlet is going to be sentenced to a billion years in the penitentiary. Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator August 25, 2024
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Manlets BTFO

Manlets (males shorter than 5ft10) blown the fuck out. Employed in recognition or mockery of a particularly devastating humiliation or defeat, suffered by a petite and effeminate sissy manlet boy. Frequently used online because the silly manlet's already lowly existence is constantly blighted by merited mortification due to his comical manletism and self-evident Napoleon complex.
Did you know that manlets face a 90%+ rejection rate from women and aren't even allowed to donate sperm? Hahahahaha! Eternally, brutally and utterly manlets BTFO!
by ManletDepreciator August 12, 2024
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supreme gentleman manlet

A mentally masochistic and excessively ego-driven manlet boy (a male shorter than 5ft10), who is extremely prone to magical thinking and manlet rage. The term was coined by Elliot "The Supreme Gentleman" Rodger (aptly named The Virgin Killer by the media) during his unsurprisingly unsuccessful period of residence in Isla Vista, California while senselessly attending Santa Barbara City College and first published in mortifying videos with hilarious titles such as: "Why do girls hate me so much", "Life is so unfair because girls don't want me", "My reaction to seeing a young couple at the beach, Envy" on his now defunct YouTube channel and in his manlet manifesto "My Twisted World". In a highly amusing manifestation of manlet mathematics and guy height, Elliot "Tall Tales" Rodger liked to claim that he was 5ft10, his shamefully stunted truthful height being around 5ft6. Evidently afflicted with a Napoleon complex deluxe, unquestionably suffering from Napoleon complex psychosis and after having been bullied throughout all of his lowly life for being a Little Napoleon, rejected by every women in southern California, wasting thousands of dollars on lottery tickets (like the money-hungry dwarf that he was) and fracturing his delicate, little ankle in a fruitless fight against a group of laughing manmores, it was only a matter of time before the queen of manletism finally snapped and embarked on his abominable "Day of Retribution". Short people got no reason.
Natalie: Why is that garden gnome over there wearing Gucci sunglasses and a Hugo Boss shirt? Erin: Supreme gentleman manlet detected. Let's throw our high heels at him and see if he goes Bagel Boss Manlet on us! Natalie: Manlets BTFO. Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator September 18, 2024
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matriculated manlet

The matriculated manlet is a silly, little manlet boy who is senselessly enrolled at a college or university. Here the completely delusional and diminutively dwarfed Oompa Loompa wastes his time (when not working shifts at the chocolate factory) by furiously staring at all the tall and happy couples who walk around the campus like the bitter and envious peewee manlet that he is, crying all alone in the girl's bathroom after being asked by campus security if he was there for Take Your Daughter to Work Day and if he had lost his daddy and by being stuffed into backpacks, lockers, trashcans, lunchboxes, drawers, toilets, empty cigarette packs, pencil cases and used condoms like the inherently effeminate and minusculely malformed midget manlet bully magnet that he was always destined to be. When not being examined microscopically while standing on a petri dish by horrified microbiology students, the matriculated manlet is free to indulge in his true passions of girlishly practicing his bumbling cheerdance routine in an effort to become the captain of the local manlet football cheer squad and undergoing a brutal hazing ritual in order to join the only fraternity that would accept him, the Sigma Beta Manlet, by engaging in a fight to the death against fourteen other oiled up, bikini-clad midgets in an electrified bird cage.
Emma: Hey, why is that matriculated manlet tearfully ranting about women while sitting in his BMW in the parking lot over there? I could barely understand his manletspeak. Why all of the manlet rage? Isabella: He approached me, introduced himself as the supreme gentleman and brusquely told me to get in his car so that I can delight in his fabulousness and magnificence. I simply looked down at him and laughingly called him a petite and utterly insignificant little manlet fairy and then he just ran away crying to his Manletmobile. Emma: Manlets, when will they learn?
by ManletDepreciator September 16, 2024
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martial arts manlet

The martial arts manlet is a minuscule and utterly insignificant manlet, who has, in an absolutely futile attempt at overcoming his insurmountably devastating manletism, hilariously decided that in order to bolster his notoriously fragile self-esteem and in a laughably delusional effort at competing with the towering manmores that terrify him, he should pursue an ill-fated career in martial arts. Closely related to the stubby and microscopic, gym coping manlet pit dweller, the overcompensating martial arts manlet can often be found engaging in mortifying public catfights with other martial arts manlets, throwing a hissy fit after being bullied by other children or crying bitter tears of manlet rage after having once again been soundly and easily defeated by a laughing manmore. Willfully ignorant of the plainly obvious truth that no amount of time wasted by bodybuilding or sparring will change the fact that he is a dwarfishly stunted, elflike and inherently effeminate runt of a sissy manlet boy who would be the belle of the ball in a women's prison, the Napoleon complex-driven martial arts manlet personifies peak manletism.
Lol, why is that spandex wearing turbo-manlet twirling around beneath that table lamp while blasting Short People over there? I think the silly martial arts manlet is shadow-boxing. Eye of the Manlet. Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator August 21, 2024
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Manlet Pit

A hole in the ground where manlets are found. Typically located in your local gym. Here the petite and effeminate manlet boys compare high heels, pay homage to their hero Randy Newman by singing Short People, futilely lift weights, jerk each other off and bitterly complain about women. Misery loves company. That's why the manlet pit is especially packed on Friday evenings and weekends because that's when normal people go out to socialize and have a great time. A concept that is, of course, completely foreign to a deeply insecure and comically stunted manlet pit inhabitant.
I just stepped over the manlet pit to hit the squat rack - WTF is going on down there? Just the usual, don't even worry about it bro. Everybody knows that short people got no reason.
by ManletDepreciator July 30, 2024
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pickup artist manlet

The abominable pickup artist manlet (a subhumanly stunted male shorter than 5ft10) is an exceptionally delusional, pea-brained low IQ manlet, even by manlet standards, because he has injudiciously chosen to invest all of his girlishly giddy energy into the frivolous pursuit of the exact group of people who despise and loathe manlet boys the most - the universality of womankind. Afflicted by indescribably immense levels of manlet cope, manlet mathematics, guy height and small man syndrome, the pint-sized, peewee pipsqueak pickup artist manlet can often be detected lying unconscious outside of bars and restaurants while wearing 9 inch high heels and an Oompa Loompa costume after another one of his childish mental midget seduction techniques of peacocking and negging unsurprisingly went awry yet again, hanging around in front of nightclubs while desperately offering to give all of the manmore bouncers standing blowjobs if they will only agree to let him drink out of an unflushed toilet in the women's bathroom and fearfully hopping around on the sidewalks of red-light districts while trying not to get stepped on and squashed as the diminutive and deranged turbo-manlet frantically attempts to peak up the skirts of all of the disgusted women that cross his precariously petite path. Short people got nobody. Manlets, when will they learn?
Pickup artist manlet: Wow, that ass must be jelly, 'cause jam don't shake like that! Hannah: You can fuck right off, you grotesquely gnomish pickup artist manlet! Choke on your dwarfish manletspeak and go posture check yourself, while I'll go have hot sex with my 6ft7 tall magnificent manmore boyfriend, you utterly insignificant, petite and effeminate, stunted little sissy fairy manlet abomination! Completely and utterly manlets BTFO.
by ManletDepreciator September 30, 2024
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