mushin softies

the act of two males laying stomach to stomach as the male on top's only contact point is his penis. this can only occur with no erections between the two participants.
when one roommate is attempting to wake up another roommate by mushin softies
by guysE5 February 12, 2010
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Miss Softie

"Instant pussy" - two plastic bags welded together and filled with water.
Miss Softie is one of our more popular fake pussies
by Anonymous November 22, 2002
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old softy

A man who has been worn down physicaly and mentaly by a old carp snatch of a wife. This man also has lost the will to obtain an erection.
That man is beyond "P" whipped! He is an old softy....
by timbone666 January 18, 2012
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Cuddling a softie

The point during sex when, even after unsuccesfully attempting to "thumb in the softie", the dissatisfied "thumbee" consoles the "thumbeur" by hugging his softie in a sympathetic embrace.
Stuey: So... how did you get on with that slug last night? You didn't have to thumb in a softie again did ya?

Sam: The poor bitch didn't even get that. But she did fall asleep cuddling a softie, so at least she didn't go home empty-handed.
by Poppa Stuey December 12, 2011
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softy bang

When a chick is too ugly to get a hard on and she insists on forcing herself upon you because she hasn't had any action in 13 years. The result is known as a softy bang.
"Oh fuck dude here comes a jundo, I think she's keen"

"Looks like you're gonna have to softy bang yourself outa this one bro"
by Jundo April 11, 2014
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Work the Softy

When you are with a romantic partner and are so drunk you can't get an erection causing you to resort to attempting intercourse with your incomplete chubby.
My girlfriend and I drank a case of beer and tried to have sex. My unit wouldn't get hard so I had to "Work the Softy".
by Uncle Knobber July 05, 2019
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free softie

When you get a handjob from a fast food employee.
I went to Wendy's and I got a free softie.
by Mr. Spackle Tackle February 14, 2021
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