whittling a wooden dick

to spend large amounts of time by yourself doing questionable ( homosexual) things.

Anybody seen Dale? He's probably in his shed whittling a wooden dick. A secret h-mo? You don't say.

by Jim Ridge March 21, 2023

Whittle's Law

Whittle's Law states that the only reason why someone or a group of people would willingly do something which makes themselves look bad is because the only alternatives would make them look even worse.

Using Bill Whittle's Law, we can know that the only reason why the politician admitted to doing cocaine is because if he had denied it then people would have eventually known both that he does cocaine and is a liar to boot.

by Demon Cyborg October 17, 2020

Whittling party

A term for an Orgy.

"Didn't mean to interrupt yer... whittling party."

by TheRealSneke October 26, 2025

turd whittling

When you hold a dump so long that It turns into a petrified turd where you have to push and retract the turd slowly over and over till it puts a tip on it to help slide it out.

I should’ve crapped 8 hours ago, now I’ll be turd whittling to get it out.

by URSALT August 17, 2020

Whittling your twig

masturbating.

You've been whittling your twig!

by tengowood August 18, 2009

whittling a wooden dick

to spend large amounts of time by yourself doing questionable ( homosexual) things.

Anybody seen Dale? He's probably in his shed whittling a wooden dick. A secret h-mo? You don't say.

by Jim Ridge March 21, 2023

little whittle

Meaning something small. A small amount

Damn babe you got a little whittle

by Zacv July 7, 2021