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Chalamba

When the sultan feels a slight discomfort in the area of the rectum, the retinue of ewer-bearers, led by the chief ewer-bearer, comes to his aid. Two of the assistants take the sultan under the arms while he squats over the gilded chamber pot. During the sultan’s straining, the chief ewer-bearer wraps the sultan’s head in his embrace, gently strokes it, and whispers soothingly: ‘Come on, Your Majesty, just a little more,’ or ‘Easy, Your Majesty, this hardship too shall pass...’

Meanwhile, the rest of the retinue prepares the set of ewers, warms the water and the towels, and so on. When the chief ewer-bearer judges that the sultan has finished, he washes the sultan’s buttocks three times with scented water, paying particular attention to the folds. After that, he carefully dries them with soft towels and applies powder (in those years, most likely ordinary talc) to his master’s rear.

One of the assistants hands him a small bottle of fragrant oil. The chief ewer-bearer lets exactly one drop run down the sultan’s spine and, at the moment it reaches the anus, with a sharp movement he ‘rubs’ it into the sultan’s anus, shouting at the top of his lungs, ‘chalamba!’
“Hey, Mihal, make one chalamba for me too, since he’s sitting with his hands in his ass anyway.”
by savageAnteater March 11, 2026
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Chalant

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