Don't Touch The Poop is a term used amongst followers of Lolcows like Chris Chan, Cyraxx and Daniel Larson as a golden rule of sorts when it comes to their antics online. The act itself is referred to as "Poop Touching" and the people who often engage in Poop Touching are considered Weens
The phrase means to avoid interacting or any other kind of engagement with Lolcows as it usually doesn't result in the reaction you are looking for and more than likely it will also have some sort of negative consequence such as being doxed by more efficient trolls or by the Lolcow themselves.
The phrase means to avoid interacting or any other kind of engagement with Lolcows as it usually doesn't result in the reaction you are looking for and more than likely it will also have some sort of negative consequence such as being doxed by more efficient trolls or by the Lolcow themselves.
Person 1: "Yo I'm gonna DM Cyraxx and tell him I'm a girl that thinks he's hot! Won't that be so funny?!"
Person 2: "Thats a stupid fucking idea dude. Don't touch the poop."
Person 2: "Thats a stupid fucking idea dude. Don't touch the poop."
by kfc_manager__ May 15, 2025
Get the Don't Touch The Poopmug. A Brown substance made of the stuff that you have previously eaten and it is usually dropped into a toilet.
by Anonymous 5 6 7 1 April 16, 2021
Get the Poopmug. by FiddlingNinja November 26, 2019
Get the Poopsmug. The Peek-A-Boo Poop:
You will crap. This poop will land in the water, and would appear to go down the hole. It will then constantly return to the surface to annoy you. Flush quickly when its at the top, or the poop will just slip back once you flush.
The Ghost Poop:
You will feel the crap crawling out, but you see nothing in the toilet. Sometimes a varient of the Peek-A-Boo poop.
The Gassy Max:
You will think its just a fart, but suddenly, a wet, smelly poop will appear. Generally comes a bit before Diarrhea.
The Professianal Poop (AKA the American Poop)
The moment your ass hits the toilet seat, this poop will flare out of ass. It is painful. It is not Diarrhea. It simply hurts, and not much comes out. Brace until its gone.
The Friendly poop:
Comes out of your ass easily. Feels good, and is pretty clean. This is the dream poop.
The Titanic poop:
A massive poop. Sometimes called a Lincoln Log. Push it out and gasp at its size.
The Giant poop:
A huge poop. Bigger then life. Hope for the best. If you are unlucky, this will rupture your bowels and kill you. If you are lucky, this will create a huge poop. Don't flush, bring all of your buddies over to gape and gasp at its size. Take pictures. You might have made a world record.
You will crap. This poop will land in the water, and would appear to go down the hole. It will then constantly return to the surface to annoy you. Flush quickly when its at the top, or the poop will just slip back once you flush.
The Ghost Poop:
You will feel the crap crawling out, but you see nothing in the toilet. Sometimes a varient of the Peek-A-Boo poop.
The Gassy Max:
You will think its just a fart, but suddenly, a wet, smelly poop will appear. Generally comes a bit before Diarrhea.
The Professianal Poop (AKA the American Poop)
The moment your ass hits the toilet seat, this poop will flare out of ass. It is painful. It is not Diarrhea. It simply hurts, and not much comes out. Brace until its gone.
The Friendly poop:
Comes out of your ass easily. Feels good, and is pretty clean. This is the dream poop.
The Titanic poop:
A massive poop. Sometimes called a Lincoln Log. Push it out and gasp at its size.
The Giant poop:
A huge poop. Bigger then life. Hope for the best. If you are unlucky, this will rupture your bowels and kill you. If you are lucky, this will create a huge poop. Don't flush, bring all of your buddies over to gape and gasp at its size. Take pictures. You might have made a world record.
by Zzzara July 4, 2021
Get the Poopmug. by DJ Callie October 10, 2019
Get the Poopmug. 
