Couch Cracker

an old stanky cracker stuck in a couch. lazy, stale, crusty, grodey, and just all around foul person

YO, you're a stanky ass couch cracker!

by Kyle/lyle March 29, 2009

Scrotum Couch

An object on which to rest your testicles. Common objects include a chin, a bag of ice (after a kicking), and a butthole (during intercourse).

Ron - 'Hey, Tim. Last night I turned Sally's chin into a scrotum couch.'

Tim - 'Sally Winters?'

Ron - 'Yeah. She was all over this shaft.'

Tim - 'You son of a bitch. I'm dating her now.'

by Dicknamer March 13, 2009

couch hopper

a person who is down on her luck (or just doesn't like living at her permanent residence), but has so many good friends that she will never be homeless because she can sleep on a different couch every night of the month

I am a professional couch hopper; hotel rooms are for amateurs or rich folk not poor college students with lots of amazing friends.

by faithyeni March 22, 2011

Couch Slug

post coital vaginal and seminal fluid left behind by a naked woman who sits on a couch.

“Norah you dirty slut, you left a greasy couch slug on my new futon!”

by #1506 November 11, 2012

Blue Couch

A picture of a woman with the largest penis ever created by science in her mouth as she sits in front of a Blue Couch sent in the form of a text to an unsuspecting person with the words "Hey I'm selling this Blue Couch but unfortunatly this is the only pic i have of it so let me know if you're interested."

Jeffrey: Hey Alex, want me to send you the Blue Couch?
Alex: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

by Ze Jeffmeister June 28, 2011

couching

the act of smoking a joint and or rolling a j.

Dude, the people in the other room are couching up a storm.

I couched on her stomach.

by starshineluv November 8, 2010

Couch Scabies

A non-harmful sexually transmitted disease obtained from having sex with your couch, in which things inside your couch become stuck to the end of a mans penis.

dude, my sofa gave me couch scabies

by JoJo hodges January 30, 2008