anal cactus

to line the rim with needles from a cactus and then sit on your partners face. or alternatively shove a cactus in your ass so their cock gets a nasty shock.

james shoved his cock in carlys ass and went oww whats that. she replied an anal cactus and cackles

by anal12345 June 9, 2012

Hugging the Cactus

A state of mind created by drug users, alcoholics and depressed people that keep them locked in a cycle of pain, remorse and self-pity. When you are hugging the cactus, you are purposefully holding onto past pain, regrets, resentment, blame and other issues that prevent you from moving forward in a positive manner. The goal of therapy and self-realization is to “let go” and “stop hugging the cactus.”

Robert Downey Jr once told a story of his past drug abuse and alcoholism days where Mel Gibson helped him by telling him to stop “hugging the cactus!” Robert stated this realization allowed him to let go of his past and move forward.

by Funkensteins Lab February 21, 2021

sweet cactus chicken jesus

1.(n) when a large cactus has grown in such a way that a chicken appears to be on top, with it's 'wings' spread as though he were crucified.


2.(excl) a expression of surprise, usually positive. can be suffixed with 'christ on a bike', for added impact/effect.

1. sorrel: 'good lord, look at that cactus!'
vinnie: 'that's a sweet cactus chicken jesus!'


2. matt: 'hey guys, we still have some beers left!'
vinnie: 'sweet cactus chicken jesus (christ on a bike)!'

by true_pictsie February 13, 2009

Arizona Cactus Swallower

While in the act of receiving a blowjob commonly referred to as a b.j. or getting head, the blowjob recipient punches the blowjob giver in the nose. This will produce a large amount of blood which will be able to come out of the mouth if the giver spits. As the recipient blows his load at the same time the giver spits the blood on it, this action should produce a red bloody liquid on the penis. The recipient will then fuck the giver until the red is no longer present on the penis. (Has better effect when either of the participants has recently shaved their genital area, giving it the effect of a prickly cactus.)

I was mad at my bitch, so I gave her an Arizona Cactus Swallower.

Last night I tried the Arizona Cactus Swallower on this slut and she liked it.

by jizzman520 October 9, 2010

spooky cactus

A half-demon creature, created when the soul of an ancient cactus-demon from the days of plant-worship inhabits the body of a human in the here-and-now. There is only one confirmed spooky cactus in existence, believed to be hidden in the north of England. From the careful analysis of this one isolated case, we have discovered that spooky cacti are blunt, cynical, sarcastic and taunt humankind for kicks.

'The spooky cactus had awoken, and was glaring with an uncertain cactical fury at the toaster, which she could not quite decided whether or not to make the victim of flaming spiny cactuslike wrath.'

by Celestia Cloud April 21, 2005

Swedish Cactus

When you grab the base of your scrotum making your testicles "pop" out of the top of your fist.

After Josh showed me his Swedish Cactus I fell madly in love with him.

by bookoute March 27, 2009

Stiff Cactus

A very slow person

Josh says he gets his weed in the mail. He is such a Stiff Cactus

by Efy17xx March 4, 2011