late crime

When you are so egregiously late for an appointment or event that it is considered criminal.

Patient: Hello, I'm Jack. I'm here for my teeth cleaning appointment.

Dental Receptionist: Your appointment was at 8:00 AM. It is now 4:56 PM. You have committed a late crime. I'm calling the police.

by Jack Atrophy August 9, 2022

Crime Minister

Infamously used for Shehbaz Sharif who was released on bail for well-documented family-led corruption case also happens to be the Prime Minister of Pakistan.

You gave me purpose Mr. Crime Minister. I can be a thug and lead a country at the same time.

we do not want a thug to lead our nation Crime Minister

by beginagain August 14, 2022

Word Crimes

When you spell the same paragraph as someone else only in different spelling.
"Just keep in mind that "be", "see", "are", "you"
Are words, not letters
Get it together
Use your spell-checker
You should never
Write words using numbers
Unless you're seven
Or your name is Prince" - Weird Al (Word Crimes)

Behold the fall of literacy, it started with and emote and ended with a whimper. I hate these WORD CRIMES.......

by Stillwatter August 21, 2022

Crime

The opposite of a kiss.

"But he wasn't there for a kiss, he was there for the opposite of a kiss, which is crime."

by PCubiles September 12, 2022

Hate Crime

that thing you do to the Dunkin Donuts cashier when they remove the seasonal donuts a week before they are fucking supposed to.

I just want fucking donut, don't make me commit a Hate Crime again.

by bigwillydanielson November 15, 2022

Crime Pickle

A pickle who commits tax fraud on the daily. This pickle has not gotten arrested because he simply goes inanimate when he hears the sirens. He can run fast and escape any grip with his slippery pickle juice. He will never be caught and/or convicted.

Person #1: What is that green thing the cops are chasing?
Person #2: That is THE Crime Pickle, he can always escape, just you watch.

That Crime Pickle is so good at Tax Evasion.

by GrinchMan25 November 18, 2022

blow crime

Black-on-white violent crime.

Surprisingly, blow crimes have nothing to do with oral sex.

by Lucian T. Skeptic November 25, 2022