Carpet bagger

A term used by ignorant, inbred, redneck motherfuckers who got outsmarted by a dude from up North

"Well gollee that doggum carpet bagger took advantage of my middle school education"

by Big Daddy W January 24, 2023

carpet douchebagger

In many ways, this is a step up from douchebag or bag of douche you all commonly know.

carpet douchebagger - n - kar-pet doosh bag-err

1. In reference to carpetbaggers of Civil War era, going about causing trouble in the eyes of the locals

2. Someone who is a DB to such an extent that they seem to carry their supply of douche with them where ever they go.

Hey Red, this guy next to me is talking shit about the bartender and is screwing with the remote after every commercial! To top it off, he didn't even tip! What a carpet douchebagger!

by Slim Twofingers February 9, 2010

Carpet Convention

Any gathering in which women out number men, the direct opposite of a sausage fest.

1.) The book fair was a straight up carpet convention, not a sausage in site.

2.) Lilith Fair

by Twinkle Twat April 5, 2011

Carpet Beating

Jerking off in someone else’s room

Stop carpet beating and get out of my room

by Ayurpjurp May 28, 2019

carpet shark

A horrible cat which likes to launch sneak attacks upon the feet and ankles of unsuspecting humans.

OUCH! That blasted CARPET SHARK!!!

by Ron Smackwalter August 10, 2007

Carpet Ass

Someone with a really hairy ass and that you can't see skin for the obstruction of hair.

If I shaved that ass I'd be able to make a Persian rug from it dude!

Total carpet asser...we could open a shop with that ass!

by Fanny Hurts May 13, 2006

carpet shuffle

When you have had the most amazing sex ever, you cannot pick up your feet to walk.

" We went at it for so long, and it felt so good, that when we were done, I couldn't even pick up my feet and walk. So I did the carpet shuffle."

by sufimomma February 15, 2009