A bulky man who loves green, and talks about his cats nonstop. His main students are Claire and Sarah. Goes on his phone while he gives us 91876 assignments to do in 45 minutes.
"Complete the 91876 assignments in 45 minutes, or it becomes homework!" John Teacher screeched, in his raspy voice
by Milkis Official September 29, 2020
Get the John Teachermug. literally the best bf a girl could ever ask for . he is so cute and is like a big baby when he around his gorgeous gf , bc how could he not his gf is literally sexy asf and is the epitome of goddess energy . but anyways john alford is the best thing that has ever happened to anyone bc he easily lights up the room with his unique personality and his bright adorable smile
by Yuzu-kin November 20, 2023
Get the john alford <3mug. by Dangetjohn June 6, 2022
Get the Johnedmug. John is a guy who works really hard in what he’s good at like sports and he tried hard in school. He cares a lot for people and if ur important to him in his life he will make time for you. He’s a goofy blonde headed guy who is east to fall for, he may have some secrets of his and feel down sometimes but really all he needs is to open up to someone even if it’s hard sometimes. He has kinda of strict parents and it can get in the way of him having fun sometimes. He gets all the girls because he’s so flirty and leaves girls wondering “I wonder when he’s gonna text back next.” He will shoot his shot but he expects the same energy back. He is super considerate and is interested in what u say and is really ideal boyfriend material. He’s ur typical teenage boy but on the inside it’s something u don’t wanna miss. HE ALSO HAS SOME NICE ABS GEEZ.
by Gabbyhaha January 11, 2021
Get the Johnmug. by LargeBowlOfRamen November 23, 2021
Get the Johnmug. John Pork was born into poverty, never knowing his mother. His father, a pig, died when John was only three, leaving him an orphan. As the offspring of a human and a pig, John was best described as a man-pig—akin to South Park's "man-bear-pig." After his father's death, John was sent to the Adoptuah "Adopt on that thang" Adoption Center, where he was adopted by G-Man, a key figure in the Skibidi Toilet Rebellion. G-Man was a celebrated pilot in the Toilet Force Air and flew the notorious "We Bring the Boom."
John's adopted mother, Hailey Welch, was an international star and the host of the popular podcast Talk Tuah. At 20, John was invited onto her show, sparking his rise to fame. His appearance led to a national phenomenon: John Pork calling people. After the podcast, John began dialing strangers' phones, causing panic and outrage. The unsolicited calls sparked protests, and the song "John Pork Is Calling", by artist dontcarewontcare, became a global hit.
However, John Pork's fame was fleeting. When the Skibidi Toilet Rebellion reignited, John was drafted. Eager to follow his father's legacy, he joined the Toilet Force Air, piloting the same plane his father had. His bravery earned him the codename "Hawk 2" and the Flickermunting Award for Upstanding Gooning.
Afterward, John met Joana Pork, his future wife, and settled in Georgia. He worked for a government contractor, built the Pork Family Compound, and fathered three children: Jimmy Ham, John Pork Jr., and Billy Bacon.
John's adopted mother, Hailey Welch, was an international star and the host of the popular podcast Talk Tuah. At 20, John was invited onto her show, sparking his rise to fame. His appearance led to a national phenomenon: John Pork calling people. After the podcast, John began dialing strangers' phones, causing panic and outrage. The unsolicited calls sparked protests, and the song "John Pork Is Calling", by artist dontcarewontcare, became a global hit.
However, John Pork's fame was fleeting. When the Skibidi Toilet Rebellion reignited, John was drafted. Eager to follow his father's legacy, he joined the Toilet Force Air, piloting the same plane his father had. His bravery earned him the codename "Hawk 2" and the Flickermunting Award for Upstanding Gooning.
Afterward, John met Joana Pork, his future wife, and settled in Georgia. He worked for a government contractor, built the Pork Family Compound, and fathered three children: Jimmy Ham, John Pork Jr., and Billy Bacon.
"Hey Adrian, you're getting a call!"
"Oh, it's from my good friend, John Pork!"
"Dude. Have you heard dontcarewontcares new single 'John Pork is calling...?' EVERYONE is listening to it!"
"Yeah, man! I saw Skibidi Chris listening to it earlier!"
"Haley Griner, what do you think of John Pork?"
"He's SO HOT!!"
"Oh, it's from my good friend, John Pork!"
"Dude. Have you heard dontcarewontcares new single 'John Pork is calling...?' EVERYONE is listening to it!"
"Yeah, man! I saw Skibidi Chris listening to it earlier!"
"Haley Griner, what do you think of John Pork?"
"He's SO HOT!!"
by Pork's Historical Society November 25, 2024
Get the John Porkmug. 