Combover wanker

A combover wanker is a new wave of asshole, they usually have a combover and talk about "swag" alot. They refer to "lad culture" regularly, yet they don't realise that getting clap at a house party and using yolo as an excuse to be a dick isn't "lad culture". They are commonly found in the age gap 14-25. They can be identified by their hair, snapbacks, ironic band shirts and share a mentality similar to the common hipster. They like to attack people who aren't "combover wankers" and often put these "attacks" on vine to get likes. They also try to latch on to other peoples things, for example, many combover hipsters wear baggy jeans and call theirselves "indie", despite the fact that they only ever heard a stone roses song once in their car with their dad one time when they were ten. These people are also similar to the cretins seen on shows like towie or made in Chelsea.

(Jon turns up wearing a nirvana shirt)
Peter: hey I like your shirt, are you a nirvana fan?
Jon: oh yeah I love teen spirit
Peter: I'm a kurt cobain fan myself
Jon: who the fucks kurt cobain I found this shirt at a house party,yolo!
Jon is a Combover wanker

by Polish Paul June 13, 2013

Briefcase Wanker

When you really wanna get to someone they fucking piss you the shitty balls off.

You fucking briefcase wanker! I'll get you, you little slag!

by PlayMakeReview July 17, 2021

Investment wanker

An investment banker who wears a white shirt with a gilet (normally Patagonia) and chats a lot of shit

That guy over there is 100% an investment wanker. Just look at his vest.

by Dave and Dan in Singapore February 17, 2023

Wuhan Wanker

A man from wuhan with the corona virus but is a nice man also

Kai boulton is a wuhan wanker

by Small booga February 17, 2020

Mirror Wanker

Someone who is extremely arrogant. He is so into himself that the only thing that turns him on is his own reflection.

What a mirror wanker, telling everyone about his new car.

by Mit Snereif December 16, 2009

Ebay Wanker

A person missing a few braincells who bids on an item before the last few minutes. Great for the seller not so great for the buyers including the EW themselves

"Hey Jeff you get that signed Star Wars trainset you were after in the end?"

"No the Ebay Wankers strikes back."

by beyoncesbitch January 12, 2012

Mask Wanker

A person who wears a face mask in an area where they are not required to and extremely unlikely to catch any virus such as inside a car

Mostly applies to people wearing masks in cars alone

Look at that woman next to us wearing a mask in the car, she's a mask wanker

by Bruhh4488 December 23, 2021