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John

John is a guy who works really hard in what he’s good at like sports and he tried hard in school. He cares a lot for people and if ur important to him in his life he will make time for you. He’s a goofy blonde headed guy who is east to fall for, he may have some secrets of his and feel down sometimes but really all he needs is to open up to someone even if it’s hard sometimes. He has kinda of strict parents and it can get in the way of him having fun sometimes. He gets all the girls because he’s so flirty and leaves girls wondering “I wonder when he’s gonna text back next.” He will shoot his shot but he expects the same energy back. He is super considerate and is interested in what u say and is really ideal boyfriend material. He’s ur typical teenage boy but on the inside it’s something u don’t wanna miss. HE ALSO HAS SOME NICE ABS GEEZ.
Me: “im no simp, but John just changes that.”
by Gabbyhaha January 11, 2021
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Ricky John

When someone jerks off inside of a Porta John in a desperate attempt to bust a nut after an unsuccessful attempt to take a girl home from the bar.
Bill: Hey Hank, what took you so long in the Porta John?

Hank: Oh I had to rub out a Ricky John real quick before I go home. I got blue balled bad tonight.
by giggitygoddamn69 January 23, 2023
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john alford <3

literally the best bf a girl could ever ask for . he is so cute and is like a big baby when he around his gorgeous gf , bc how could he not his gf is literally sexy asf and is the epitome of goddess energy . but anyways john alford is the best thing that has ever happened to anyone bc he easily lights up the room with his unique personality and his bright adorable smile
random bih: ouu girl i need to get me a john alford <3 i heard they do it best
by Yuzu-kin November 20, 2023
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John Gowans as Ward Evans

John's Ward Evans, a mysterious scientist. Is he friend or foe to the atomic age, huh?
Example of how it's used in a sentence:

Person 1: Who's that character in Oppenheimer?

Person 2: That's John Gowans as Ward Evans, shrouded in atomic mystery, man!
by courtofowls September 4, 2023
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John Cena

Is hot
John : "Hey, how do you think I look?"
Joe : "John Cena"

John and Joe later got married and had 3 children
by hola nino September 24, 2021
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john hardie pint

a terribly poured pint, pint with so much head you could stick a flake in it
john: ‘pours a crap pint’

customer: “that’s a john hardie pint !!! “
by Pscho beech December 11, 2023
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John Lewis Teaspoon

The process of getting a shiny new Teaspoon from John Lewis and using it to extract someone's eyeball then having intercourse with the empty socket
Glenn is such an *sshole if he keeps it up im totally going to John Lewis Teaspoon him.
by 969-696 February 16, 2024
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