refers to walking somewhere instead of getting a ride
"I couldn't get a ride to work so I took the two shoe express."
by *~kath~* May 30, 2008
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when you take a week old cannoli, put it into your partner's ass hole (preferably if named Donny or Pauly), then place a candle or other instrument of a wax coat over sed asshole, light the candle and melt the wax to seal the flavor like Thomas Jefferson stamping one of his world famous letters.
Hey, I just hit a new milestone in my relationship with my girlfriend. Last night she gave me the Thomas Jefferson Express!

- Nice bro, #goals
by Pauly the brooklyn itilian February 13, 2018
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An individual who lacks self-awareness and is possibly suffering from a mental illness. Person may appear unkempt to others but is too delusional to see that in the mirror. Said person will often spout off on topics of which they aren’t well informed and often makes statements that are not based on fact. Given to espousing conspiracy theories. Easily drawn into cults. These people rarely contribute to society in a productive manner. See Majorie Taylor Greene for the epitome of this definition.
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When one chooses the freedom to release oneself from the material confines between pants and body on any given day or time.
Johnson is really hanging loose because he's riding on the free ball express!
by BitterB November 15, 2005
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Descriptive of a person with personal issues involving mood swings, unpredictable disposition - similar to those caused by bipolar disorder or schizophrenia.
Him/her? Seems nice, but is riding the bipolar express...one day she'll hug you and the next day bite your head off for no apparent reason
by Jerome Engelberts June 15, 2007
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A common, recurrent and ultimate damnation bestowed upon Stinky Brain by the Wonderschlong for repeatedly making comments such as : "Frangelica is monk spooge that is collected by altar boys" and "Why don't you take a dump on that church?" syn. = hell express.
yuuper1: Ever think about fucking a nun?
yuuper2: Dude, you are on the front seat of the express train to hell for thinking that!
by Stinky Brain December 27, 2003
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A guy ejaculates into someones ass they fart before the penis is out and it gets all over the penis which then spontaneously combusts
Your mother sent me to the ER from a Cum Cannon Express
by HornyTitLicker June 13, 2010
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