Customer Logic

Throwing all reasoning out the window and being the stupidest fucking moron you can humanly be.

It operates under three basic principles:

1. Complete lack of accountability (even actively refusing to take any)
2. Complete lack of empathy (i.e. sociopathic behavior)
3. Unwarranted self importance (i.e. severe narcissism)

Formal logic:
Premise 1: person parks on No Parking area.
Premise 2: person gets a parking ticket.
Conclusion: if you park on No Parkin areas, you get a parking ticket.

Customer logic:
Premise 1: person parks on No Parking area.
Premise 2: person gets a parking ticket.
Conclusion: OMG IT WAS JUST A FUCKING MINUTE I WILL GO TO THE NEAREST STARBUCKS TO DEMAND TO SPEAK TO THEIR MANAGER AND ASK FOR FREE LATTES FOR LIFE BECAUSE THEY SHOULD'VE TOTALLY WARNED ME ABOUT IT AND WILL SUE EVERYONE BECAUSE MY PARKING TICKET IS EVERYBODY ELSE'S FAULT.

by MrDanteSesma December 16, 2019

papa logic

Papa logic is the idea that we are all dads. I’m a dad, you’re a dad, we’re all dads. He, she, and they are dads, and we’re all papas.

Person 1: “Dude, Mason’s such a dad “
Person 2: “Ya man, and JD really understands that papa logic”

by papa triesty June 1, 2018

Georg Logic

When you are just dumb your logic is called Georg Logic

Someone: "There are to many, to many speaking in voice chat of choice!" Twenty minutes later: "It is to quiet in this voice chat!"
Someone else: "boi this Georg Logic!"

by BlackLightDragon August 22, 2020

Minecraft Logic

A crappy out-of-touch with reality logic from the famous 2009 game, Minecraft. It includes breaking crops when jumping on them, gold tools being the most useless tools in the game, and a portable hell from a very old version of the game which was removed, achieving godspeed with riding a CANOE (it is called a boat in-game) on ice! Not an iceboat, a canoe. Stopping the player from being poisonous, nauseous and all that good/bad stuff that is included in the game just by drinking milk. Plus, it is straight from the cow. Not pasteurized. And also you can get a music disc by making a creeper (an exploding mob in the game) get killed by a skeleton! (Self-explanatory skeleton with a bow) And much more stupid things.

Hey dude, what is the crappiest video game logic you know?
It's the Minecraft logic. There are so many out-of-touch things.

by Arcxxus February 6, 2022

Cartoon logic

Logic based on fallacies that cannot be backed up by actual evidence. Like building a fire underwater, their logic is flawed and childish

“Hey did you know that I’ve gotten straight A’s throughout high school, so know I’m definitely going to get a scholarship”

Shut up you weirdo book worm. You have cartoon logic. No college wants a nerd who plays no sports.

by spicy mayo August 23, 2020

logical lozz

A logical lozz is a creature whose life is riddled with mistakes, but uses his logic to overcome these problems with amazingly logical ideas.

Things that work correctly are not allowed near this creature.

A logical lozz scenario:

"The first car was fine until I left the water cap off"

OR

"The second car was fine until I had to rebuild the engine"

OR

"The third car was fine until I crashed it"

by Lozz! September 27, 2009

leap of logic

1. Taking conclusions without enough supporting premises (or even no supporting premises at all)
2. Forcing two irrelevant shits to be related

List of logical leaps:
1. Cocoklogi (non causa pro causa/questionable cause fallacy)
2. Black and white/either-or/false dilemma
3. Being overdramatic (a.k.a. Slippery Slope and Strawman)
4. Argument from ignorance (we don't know X, therefore X is wrong)
5. Hasty generalization

Whoa, both the Left and the Right are the experts of mental gymnastics and leap of logic!

by Sir. B November 20, 2021