crispy bagel

The supreme type of bread; a plain, room temp bagel with cream cheese that was toasted until brown. Eating this will announce to the world: "Sup fuckers, I'm insert name here and I have a large dick"

Damn, that chad is eating a crispy bagel, must have a large dick.

by SStec November 18, 2019

Bagel Head

A person who is rather plain, typical, or boring. A person who doesn't exactly have any special qualities to them. For Example: a barely to non-existing personality.

"You're always the same mate; dark clothes, always acting tough, you're just a plain Bagel Head man."

by Goat_011 July 31, 2020

Bagel Run

When your mind wanders during conversation, as if it's going off to get bagels for a second.

"Sorry, could you repeat that? I was on a bagel run just now."

by TwoBrassBrads June 17, 2012

Spatch-bagel

A person who is weird or creepy. This kind of person is usually avoided by the general public.

Girl 1:"Hey why don't you dance with matt?"
Girl 2: "Psh hellna he's such a spatch-bagel. He comments all my pictures on myspace and i barely know him!"

The Spatch-bagel sat at home and played pokemon by himself...all day

by Drippy MC August 25, 2008

Bagel Jizz

when the cream cheese from the bagel you are eating gets in the corners of your mouth

co-worker: "You got some bagel jizz on your face"

by kopask January 18, 2015

bagel nation

when jews love bagels so much they worship them

i am apart of the bagel nation

by edentheeater December 4, 2016

Eat bagel

In a fencing bout when you win 5-0, you have earned the right for your teammates to shout "Eat bagel!" as a celebration because 0 looks like a delicious bagel.

"They just swept 5-0?? LETS GO!! EAT BAGEL" - Your teammate after you win a bout 5-0

by TehSwaggeest August 22, 2021