Shit the Lid

Aka jumping the gun. When someone is prairie dogging for a long time and can not hold it any longer. They run to the tiolet and don't have enough time to think. They sit down, shit, but do not realize they didn't lift the lid. Therefore making a mess all over the lid, bowl, and/or walls.

Jermaine: Did you hear bout Dwayne?
Jamal: Ya i heard, he was so pissed drunk he shit the lid.
Labron: Damn bro that gross, now i gots to clean that shit up.

Shit the Lid by I soiled myself January 8, 2011

THE PERFECT SHIT

Every once in a while everyone experiences the perfect Brown Trout. It's rare but a real thing of beauty. You sit down expecting the worst, but what you get is a smooth sliding, fart-less masterpiece that breaks the water with the splash-less grace of an Olympic high-diving champion. You use the toilet tissue to find that it was totally unnecessary. It makes you feel that all is right in the world and that you are in perfect harmony with it.

no farts or splash back, thats the perfect shit!

THE PERFECT SHIT by BRETT THE HITMAN HOLT June 21, 2012

Does the Pope shit in the woods? 

Does the Pope shit in the woods? An expression derived from the conjugation of two well known expressions that simply mean "obviously". The two expressions are "does a bear shit in the woods?" and "Is the Pope Catholic?"

Q. Hi babe, do you want me to pick up some wine for diner?"
A. "Does the Pope shit in the woods?!"

Does the Pope shit in the woods? by Dr Yaj May 26, 2021

shit the titty 

when you drink before noon

it is 11:50! you have 10 minutes to shit the titty

shit the titty by shh don’t tell bitty August 8, 2021

on the clock shit 

noun. (an addition to "The Shit List")

This is any kind of shit that you take while you are punched in (clocked in) at work. Lunch hour and coffee break shits do not qualify.

"Thought you might have fell down the toilet since you took so long in the bathroom?"

"Oh no, I just needed to take a nice "on the clock shit"!

on the clock shit by jamminspacey January 24, 2010

The Wet Shit

A Wet Shit is when you wipe your ass fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So you end up putting toilet paper between your ass and your underwear so you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.

"Well, I did have a little bit of a Wet Shit yesterday," Jimmy said.

"I can tell," said his friend Jerry.

"How come," said Jimmy.

"I see the wet brown stuff running down your leg," said Jerry.

The Wet Shit

The Wet Shit by The Dumbass That Knows June 21, 2016

The "Oh Shit" Handle 

The handle located near a passenger in a car. It is used in life threatening situations, usually by a spontaneous or involuntary actions.

Passenger: Can you slow down man? You're making me nervous.
Driver: I can't, I need to make it home before my parents
Passenger: Why?
Driver: I left my weed out in the den.
(driver makes a sudden right turn)
Passenger: OH SHIT! You crazy asshole, thanks for this handle though.
Driver: That's exactly why it's called The "Oh Shit" Handle.
Passenger: oh... yea.

The "Oh Shit" Handle by mschne7 June 15, 2009