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Captain Crunch

Perhaps the greatest creation mankind has ever achieved, alongside sliced bread. A fruity cereal with a absolute savage, badass captain on the cover of the box. Consumers usually eat Captain Crunch with milk, although more die-hard fans will tend to eat right out of the box. Legend has it that if you eat a whole box of Captain Crunch alone in a dark room, the Captain himself will visit you in your dreams that night.
"I'm starting my morning off with some sweet-ass Captain Crunch, to maximize the awesome in my day"
by I ran out of good name ideas December 17, 2014
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Captain Crunch

A title to give someone who injured you accidentally or intentionally, causing broken bones or torn tissue.

Some one who destroys property.
We started off just trowing tomahawks into the dartboard for fun when captain crunch here decided to smash my new TV
by withinthecube December 27, 2012
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Related Words

Big Crunch

Dinner was great, sweetie, now I gotta go take a big crunch.
by Stef November 19, 2004
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Captain Crunch

Bland; utterly unremarkable; as exciting as eating a bowl of captain crunch
"how was the party?"
"eh, it was pretty captain crunch"
by Joe Sherrock December 5, 2007
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Captain Crunch

Incompetent and/or oblivious moron of a driver who is prone to crashing vehicles into walls, backing into cement traffic-barriers, taking out road-signs, knocking over lamp-posts, denting other parked cars, flattening potted plants, squashing trash-cans, etc.
"Helpful" neighborhood kid: Want me to move your car for you"
You: No thank you, Captain Crunch. I see all the dents you've already put in your own car!
by QuacksO September 23, 2011
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Captain Crunch

He is a gay dumb ass captain that loves to crunch. Also a cereal name
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The Crunch

A lesser known name for a nasty ass STD.
I just got The Crunch from that ratchet ass bitch. This shit blows, man. My ball sack is on FIRE.
by DuckyDoolittle August 7, 2014
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