jesus the bum

one of the many legendary bums of hoboken, nj. he gets his name from his tall, lanky appearance, and having hair and a beard as long as to resemble jesus christ himself. he is usually found wandering around the palisades (a.k.a the trails) or seen loitering around the mcdonalds on 3rd and washington st. rumours have it that his first name is "bob" and he totally lost it from an overdose of scooby doo acid back in the seventies.

eeyyyoo, you know where jesus the bum at? we want to get some booze from mohammed's.

nah, but i know mark the bum is down by cvs doing his shit

by rickrock May 26, 2008

magnus erickson alexanderson the divine jesus chair

He was born out of the Scandinavian god Odin's rectum on October 9, 1944 (Leif Eriksson Day) due to a wolf-styled anal plug. Later killed in an accident involving poisonous blowfish innards, he was then reborn through a cake recipe in which the blond-haired baker didn't do the cooking by the book. However the oven was built into the volcano Eyjafjallajokull, and he was blown into a bush at a park in Nevada (after Iceland's banking crisis). There, he was discovered by Funion-eating Americans, whom adopted him as their love child. He currently resides with bitch-ass white kids and drug-dealing draugr, leaded by a half-Asian named Fuzzy Sheiben. Please subscriebe and donate nao so he can fulfill his dream of meeting Alexander Rybak. Join the Felowship of Magnus Followers who partake in the journey to his birthplace in Iceland.

ALL HAIL MAGNUS ERICKSON ALEXANDERSON THE DIVINE JESUS CHAIR

by planttreesplease January 24, 2015

miracle from the baby Jesus

Something so wondrous or unlikely of happening that it has to be a miracle from the baby Jesus himself.

Ice-T's wife, Coco has an ass so glorious that is a miracle from the baby Jesus.

Chuck Norris being elected president would be a miracle from the bJesus.

by Alyson Clair October 28, 2008

the bearded jesus

When your trabagging your girl and accidentally shart

I was tea bagging my girl the other night and accidentally sharted on her face. She look like the bearded jesus

by Tweeter23 October 5, 2018

The Redneck Jesus

The man known here on earth as Dale Earnhardt. Dale Earnhardt is the Light and the Way. He died so that your drinking of imported beer would be forgiven. He suffered, died, and most of the pieces they found were buried. He has risen again, as Danica Patrick, and will come again from Formula One to judge NASCAR and its fans.

He is seated at the right hand of the Father (Elvis), and his Kingdom will have no end. Amen, y'all.

"The Redneck Jesus, Dale Earnhardt, died for your sins."

"Thou shalt not turn right."

by Anferny Tyrone Jackson August 28, 2006

St Theresa of the Child Jesus Catholic School

Horrible school in Des Moines Iowa the treats students horrible

I am never coming back to St Theresa of the Child Jesus Catholic School

by Dodomemelove June 28, 2021

The Redneck Jesus

The man known here on earth as Dale Earnhardt. Dale Earnhardt is the Light and the Way. He died so that your drinking of imported beer would be forgiven. He suffered, died, and most of the pieces they found were buried. He has risen again, as Danica Patrick, and will come again from Formula One to judge NASCAR and its fans.

He is seated at the right hand of the Father (Elvis), and his Kingdom will have no end. Amen, y'all.

"The Redneck Jesus, Dale Earnhardt, died for your sins."

"Thou shalt not turn right."

by Anferny Tyrone Jackson August 29, 2006