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Manlets, when will they learn?

An expression of amused exasperation at, or well-deserved and hilarious mockery of the apparent inability of manlets in general to comprehend and accept their rightful and eternal position at the very bottom of the social food chain. Relentlessly driven forward by his gnawing and ever-present Napoleon complex, complete desperation and utter delusion, the stunted, pathetic and deeply insecure manlet continually exposes himself to justified public ridicule, humiliation and condemnation. Thereby necessitating the question: manlets, when will they learn?
Why are all those sobbing sissy manlet boys dejectedly sitting around in front of the sperm bank over there? Don't you know? You have to be 5ft10 or taller to donate sperm. Hahahahaha! Manlets, when will they learn?
by ManletDepreciator August 11, 2024
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Manlet Detection Agency

The Manlet Detection Agency is a crucial government entity that seeks to, using the long arm of the law, squash the derisory emergence of a pint-sized manlet insurgency. The brave men and women of the Manlet Detection Agency work tirelessly to protect the community from the ever-present threat of a manlet uprising by relentlessly detecting manlets both online and irl. Suspected manlets are detained and then searched and stripped of any contraband like height boosting insoles and high heels. Subsequently the potential Little Criminals are meticulously measured and, if confirmed to be shorter than 5ft10 and therefore a soon-to-be prison wife manlet, the stunted manlets are arrested on the spot. Every lacking inch below 5ft10 is known to be reflected by an additional ten-year prison term in the girlish manlet's well-deserved sentence, which will be imposed upon the puny manlet by a fuming judge as the microscopic manlet boy stands small in a courtroom atop of his towering attorney's outstretched palm securely shackled by a string of dental floss.
Hey, isn't that the minuscule turbo-manlet Kevin Hart getting hemmed up by a heroic group of mobile task force agents from the Manlet Detection Agency? It sure is. That diminutively petite and astronomically effeminate sissy manlet is going to be sentenced to a billion years in the penitentiary. Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator August 25, 2024
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The Manlet

The Manlet is a hilariously brilliant trollsome poem penned by the phenomenally formidable 6-foot tall English mathematician, logician, photographer and novelist, the invigoratingly illustrious Charles Lutwidge Dodgson, better known by his notable nom de plume Lewis Carroll. True to the nature of the mental giant and valiant visionary that Lewis Carroll unquestionably was, The Manlet much later kickstarted and inspired the heavily manletism-focused online height enthusiast movement, that still remains universally beloved and enthusiastically active, by for example periodically manifesting itself via the perhaps less elegant but certainly equally eloquent manlet death threads that providentially pervade the internet to this very day. Before tragically dying of pneumonia in 1898 at the age of 65, Lewis Carroll invented a word puzzle game that he called the doublet, no doubt as a final nod to all of the magnificent manmores out there who would inevitably in the future aspire to follow in his colossal footsteps.
Manmore 1: ... and that's how the minuscule manlet boy ended up in the vacuum cleaner bag. By the way, what's your favorite song? Manmore 2: The musical masterpiece Short People by the godlike Randy Newman of course! What's your favorite poem, brah? Manmore 1: The Manlet by the preeminent Lewis Carroll, without a doubt! Manmore 2: Short people got no reason. Manmore 1: Dwarfishly-statured manlets BTFO.
by ManletDepreciator October 8, 2024
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myopic manlet

The cerebrally and physically stunted myopic manlet is a microscopic mental midget of a minuscule manlet boy, who shortsightedly sees only the literally subhuman suffering of his own small-minded dwarven kind because, due to his eternal inability to grow up and be the bigger man, big picture thinking goes right over his pea-brained, little head. Deceased myopic manlets can often be found squashed flat as a pancake on country roads next to their close relative the, by comparison majestic, toad. Myopic manlets can easily be driven to venting their pent-up manlet rage and throwing a hissy fit with innocent questions and observations, such as: "Manlet detected.", "Nice high heels, my girlfriend has the same pair.", "Are you classified as a turbo-manlet? How tall are you?", "Aren't you the midget who played the manletservant Nick Nack in The Man with the Golden Gun?"
Manmore 1: Hey, why is that little girl crying in front of that beauty salon? Manmore 2: Myopic manlet detected. I think his new acrylic nails broke off when he got mauled by that chihuahua over there. Manmore 1: Lol, the victorious chihuahua even took the sissy manlet's high heels! Manmore 2: Manlets rise up!
by ManletDepreciator September 16, 2024
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barnyard manlet

The barnyard manlet, also known as the cabbage patch manlet, is a microscopically minuscule misanthropic manlet who has been so completely and utterly driven to madness by the devastatingly deadly disability of manletism (the catastrophically crippling curse of excruciatingly and eternally existing as a dwarfed male shorter than 5ft10), that he now indulges in a countryside lifestyle by frolicking around like the tiny fairy that he is in barnyards while wearing flowery and frilly summer dresses and high heels. Quickly adapting to his new environment, akin to the stunted sub-aquatic murloc manlet, the bitterly boyish barnyard manlet is always eager to please his superlatively superior, supremely magnificent manmore farmer overlord by enthusiastically serving as a chew toy for the towering farmer's guard dogs, as a garden gnome (naturally), a doorstop, a leg rest, a spittoon and as a Stalinesquely stunted hobbit scarecrow after rightfully receiving a hanging wedgie from a laughing pig named Napoleon and then sobbingly dangling for hours on end suspended by his pink panties from a toothpick embedded in a field in the middle of nowhere. Manlet Animal Farm. In his spare time the barnyard manlet enjoys mud wrestling chickens (before having his way with them) and chugging down copious amounts of Hobbit Ale (made from fermented rabbit poop and petty-dwarf roots) mixed with horse semen (in the desperate hope of finally triggering a growth spurt), as is the dwarven tradition.
Barnyard manlet: Hey there sweet cheeks, do you wanna buy some of my Hobbit Ale? Samantha: Absolutely not! Now cease your tall tales manletspeak, choke on your enema juice, posture check yourself, pick up your high heels and then go cry in the nearest manlet pit, you grotesquely gnomish, petite and puny, ridiculous runt of an effeminate Ewok mama's boy midget monstrosity! Manlets BTFO.
by ManletDepreciator October 2, 2024
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malaria manlet

The malaria manlet (a dwarfed male shorter than 5ft10) is a diminutive and diseased, microscopically minuscule little midget monstrosity who has contracted malaria because of the stuntedly swamplike living conditions that he endures due to amusingly having little baby legs and therefore standing so low that one would have to pick him up just to say hello. If the petite and puny malaria manlet surprisingly survives the gaping wound left by the infectious bite of a to him dragonlike mosquito, then he will subsequently begin to suffer from explosive diarrhea, hobbit feet, Napoleon complex psychosis and of course uncontrollable bouts of manlet rage before finally metamorphosing into a murloc manlet and wearily waddling away to effeminately frolic around in a nearby puddle like the girlishly fairylike runt of a sexy sissy manlet princess that his mouselike manletism has hilariously forever doomed him to be. Malaria manlets BTFO.
Maria: Did you hear that Tiny Tom called in sick today again? Manmore: Good, I never liked that subhumanly stunted little malaria manlet anyway! Maria: Me neither. Manlets are just gross! Manmore: Short people got no reason. Maria: Manlets rise up!
by ManletDepreciator October 10, 2024
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Bagel Boss Manlet

Representing the pint-sized personification of manlet rage and standing shockingly small at 5 foot nothing, Chris "Bagel Boss" Morgan rose to short-lived infamy when he threw a hissy fit extraordinaire at a Long Island Bagel Boss in 2019. After falsely claiming that the friendly female cashier had smirked at his comically dwarfed height, Chris "Sissy Manlet" Morgan was recorded by amused onlookers as he was instantly overwhelmed by manlet rage and went on a childish tirade, furiously ranting about how women (understandably) hate him due to his sensationally stunted stature and egregiously evident Napoleon complex. Subsequently to being asked by a much taller customer to calm down and grow up, the rageaholic turbo-manlet petulantly proclaimed: "Shut your mouth! You're not God, or my father, or my boss!" - only to then transform into a tiny, little hamster when a heroic manmore made short work of the midget monstrosity and tackled him. Helpful height enthusiasts later found his now defunct YouTube channel featuring many similar videos which triggered an escalating series of well-deserved trolling sagas, eventually culminating in the Bagel Boss Manlet being cut down to size (more so than he naturally was) and thereby stopped short of realizing his delusional dream of following in the microscopic footsteps of ill-famed celebrity turbo-manlets such as Tiny Tom Cruise and Kevin "Homunculus" Hart by becoming just another high heels wearing comic relief Hollywood Oompa Loompa manlet.
Materialistic manlet: WHERE THE FUCK ARE MY HIGH HEELS?! Manmore: Cease your manletspeak and don't go Bagel Boss Manlet on me. Here, bounce around on this stress ball and dry your tiny tears with this tampon, you silly, little manlet boy.
by ManletDepreciator September 18, 2024
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