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Ding dong danger wank

The act of danger wanking while ding dong ditching someones house. The wanker must ring the doorbell, and then successfully masturbate before they can run away. All before the person answers the door.
-Dude, Jim totally ding dong danger wanked Kathleen's house last night.
-Niiice, did he get away?
-Yeah, hes a pro at it.
by Ultra Super Supreme King Dick November 6, 2011
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Supreme Danger Wank

The generic and conventional 'Danger Wank' where one must crack one off whilst calling mother to ones bedroom with the challenge of shooting load before she enters is so last century.

How about add some more 'Danger'

The 'Supreme Danger Wank' is where one calls mother to ones bedroom before self service has commenced. The aim of the game is wait until mother is in bedroom then proceed to wank one's self into oblivion and shooting man milk aimlessly before mother leaves the bedroom in disgust.
Can I sleep on your couch for a few days mate? My mum has had enough of my Supreme Danger Wanks, got jizz on her new cardigan this time!
by Filthy Disturbance April 23, 2017
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extreme danger wank

A regular Danger Wank, with the added Danger of another person/enemy/vicar being IN THE SAME ROOM as you. Includes if the person is asleep, passed out or pre-occupied with the other gender.

N.B. This does NOT apply behind a closed door, eg. in a toilet cubicle. Too easy.

N.B. The other person CANNOT be your girlfriend/partner.
Ed: I had an extreme danger wank whilst my mum was in the room.
by ed chrisleni January 3, 2009
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Fire Danger Wank

The act of setting fire to a 'fuse' of lighter fluid and attempting to finish wanking before the fire reaches your balls. no to be attempted by the beginner, should only be performed in a masturbatorium.
Tried to have a fire danger wank last night... all i'll say is roasted nuts!
by The Marine Scientist November 11, 2013
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Butchers Danger Wank

The act of self pleasure where one (usually a butcher) takes a freshly sharpened knife and places it underneath his scrotum whilst masturbating. Knowing that any slip or excessive movements will cause severe damage adds to his depraved sense of excitement.
Mum warned me not to use her good steak knives if I was to have a cheeky Butchers Danger Wank.
by Han Ho April 28, 2009
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a nigel danger wank

Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.
by mrs tosser October 6, 2025
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a nigel danger wank..

a nigel danger wank
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Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.
by mrs tosser October 7, 2025
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