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Canine Affective Disorder

The condition of allowing a dog to control your emotions.
Why is he always either lovingly kissing his dog or angrily screaming at it , he has Canine affective disorder.
by lazylinguist August 9, 2012
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canine h20

another way of saying 'dog water'
"you're badddd, you're canine h20", taken from the infamous song called "One Shot"
by creator of canine_h20 February 20, 2022
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Canine Cumshot

Right as you're cumming, your dog trots over and walks right into your cumshot making your pooch temporarily blind and disoriented.
Jim: The weirdest thing happened to my dog yesterday.
John: What happened bro?
Jim: I gave him an accidental Canine Cumshot.

John: WTF!
by DarkWolfRising January 4, 2011
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Canine whipped

A household that is run by a pet. Specifically a dog. What the dog wants, it gets, and when it wants it. Typically the owners do not see the scenario at all and comment on their "wonderful pet". Outsiders and friends though can see the caos and true pecking order.
Friend says "man you are canine whipped". Similar term used for girlfriends and wives.

Examples for being "canine whipped" can include:

Get up multiple times in night to let dog out.
Dog will not come to you when you call it.
Dog sits in middle of road ignoring cars
Dog jumps out car window while car is moving
Have to drive car around road to exhaust dog so can catch it when it stands still
Relaxing walk with friend and dogs ends in running and yelling match to try and keep dogs under control.
by MtIronWalker September 18, 2013
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A term used to describe an even more useless version of a dog and pony show.
"I hear HR wants a dog and pony show tomorrow."

"Worse, we got a canine equestrian extravaganza on our hands."

"Damn."
by Rapier June 27, 2007
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Canine Cop

The most annoying person on the planet. Once you meet a Canine Cop you'll instantly want to mute him. His whining, complaining and the annoying noises he makes with no regard to anyone else make him even slightly more annoying than a Ruined Leaf.
Yo, will that Canine Cop ever shut up? No he won't! He was born to annoy the hell out of you. He's worse than Ruined Leaf.
by Flemroid May 19, 2009
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Canine Dysfunction

Mental condition wherein human beings see other human beings as filthy animals while seeing dogs as their brothers, sisters, or, most often, children. Condition may cause said persons to do the following:

- become filled with outrage when a dog is killed, even accidentally; however, when humans are killed or abused, they turn a blind eye to it.

- bring their dogs into restaurants and supermarkets and become outraged when told that their pet doesn't belong there, insisting it is "a member of their family" and that the store is discriminating against them.

- pay thousands of dollars for their pets to have treatments for cancer, but bemoan human beings "running up huge hopsital bills for their family" when trying to survive cancer.

- make hilarious statements such as "I would rather heaven was full of dogs than people," not realizing that such would mean they wouldn't be there, either.

- feed their dog from their dinner table and even let the dog take stuff right off of their plate, but get mad if someone "breaches protocol" by eating with their fingers or putting their elbows on the table.

It is important to note that Canine Dysfunction is not limited to dog owners, but can also affect the owners of any other type of house pet, both common and uncommon, in a similar fashion with regard to their animal of choice.
Some woman with canine dysfunction was carrying her poodle around the grocery store and made a huge scene when she was told that only Seeing-Eye Dogs were allowed in the store. It only got more awkward when she declared that she and her "child" were leaving and would be talking to a lawyer about a discrimination suit.
by JustAnotherGuy October 16, 2012
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