Skip to main content

rockstar barista

An espresso machine operator, who possesses not only exceptional skill in producing the finest quality espresso shots and drinks from the materials given (freshly ground coffee, water, espresso machine), but also possesses charisma, confidence and general aplomb with customers and co-workers in the espresso bar environment.

Compare with ninja barista.
That rockstar barista at Hines pulled me one of the best shots I've had in months, after giving me heaps of 'tude.
rockstar barista by Jimmy Oneschuk January 18, 2006

Barista Special 

The Barista Special is when a male Barista will pass the time during his tiring, difficult day job by occasionally stroking himself during the afternoon slow hours, accumulating his semen in a milk jug of his choosing. He will wait until an innocent, unaware customer places an order before pulling their shot and reaching over to his seedy milk jug, placing it under the steam wand and starting to steam the mixture of his potential children and leftover milk until it reaches a consistency he deems appropriate. He will then finish the coffee, using his milky swimmer potion to create some late art upon his creation, preferably in the shape of a beautiful swan. Once the cum coffee is finished, he will deliver it to the customer, standing behind the counter and watching as they start to drink his sick concoction, stroking himself to the sight. The customer is disgusted with the taste, and will throw the coffee away, in most cases leaving a complaint. This is the best part for the Barista. He gets off on the degradation. This will force the Barista to ejaculation, and he will retrieve his milk jug, and begin the process again.
Barista: “Dude, today is kinda slow! Might get time this afternoon for a Barista Special.”

Coworker: “I’m serious, Darren. Get some fucking help before I, honest to god, submit you to an institution myself.”

Baristud 

1) The slightly more masculine version of a barista, who measures self-worth by their ability to pour latte art. Runs on pure coffee, it is very dangerous to remove a Baristud from his caffeine. This term came into popularity after the scandal with Taylor the Latte Boy.

2) A person characterized by strong impulses to roast coffee beans and talk about their deep feelings with strangers.
Tooti: My favorite barista wasn't there today!
Fruiti: Did you talk to the new one?
Tooti: he's totally a baristud. He asked me how the foam heart on my coffee made me feel
Baristud by dancingjellydoughnuts January 14, 2011

Baristapotomus 

When you go to a coffee shop expecting to see a cute barista ready to make you some coffee, but instead you find a dried up sea hag pushing three on the hoof where the single origin must have been imported somewhere around her.
Ghon went to his local coffee shop expecting there to be a cute blonde spinner to make his morning coffee, but when he got there he was pleased to see the baristapotomus bloated ready for his order. Ghon though about asking for a walrus belch to go along with his Latte.
Baristapotomus by SkulletBuster October 19, 2017

Barista Jam 

an opportunity for baristas to come together and pull shots, learn more, and essentially nerd out for one or more days. Those that drive ridiculous distances to attend these as possible are considered to be 'jam whores'
"Dude, are you going to the barista jam next weekend? I heard there's gonna be a latte art throw down!"
"No...it's like 7 hours away! I'm not a jam whore like you."
Barista Jam by squidgeroo March 27, 2009

Baristatute 

A barista who knows how to cup both your balls and your mocha. Generally are found at Starbucks or Seattle's Best, but the best and hottest are found in Italy. Baristatutes also can handle warm liquids in or around their face.
That baristatute really frothed my milk.
Baristatute by Pety April 23, 2008