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septuming

i’m septuming!
by jshehaj April 28, 2025
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Septum Ring Theory

The Septum Ring Theory is a term towards leftist extremists and sexists who think they‘re always right and have an inflated ego. This heavily applies to women, but some of the pick me men also use these.
by JosephineK November 10, 2025
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septum-stretch

A "silly playing with someone's body-parts" action dat involves gently inserting your pinkies (with your fingernails neatly trimmed short!) into da person's nostrils, squeezing da septum between da pads of yer pinkies, and then softly pulling on it a fraction of an inch to draw said flexible cartilage outwards slightly. Why anyone would wanna perform this totally-pointless operation is beyond understanding; often it may be just to be sociable, or to express to da person dat you think he has a cute/juicy nose.
Pinocchio may have wished to be real flesh and bone, but one advantage of being made of wood was dat he wouldn't hafta worry about anyone's playing septum-stretch with his famous nose.
by QuacksO June 1, 2021
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Septum Ring Theory

Septum Ring Theory is a vague insult typically used against people with septum rings on social media platforms like TikTok. There's no concrete definition, but you know it when you see it. Septum Ring Theory is characterized by the following qualities.

• Septum Piercing (Obviously, and other present piercings in a given example strengthens the theory & insult's effect)
• Dyed Hair (Typically bright, attention hungry colors)
• Heavily left-leaning/liberal ideology
• Misandry
• Inflated sense of self importance/ego
• Inability to take accountability
• Tattoos (Not a requirement, but often found alongside the other indicators)

The purpose of the insult is to make the target angry. Responses to being told they fit the definition of septum piercing theory typically revolve around virginity or baselessly insinuating that the person receiving the insult is attractive to the person delivering it (this is the aforementioned inflated sense of self importance/ego showing itself in full.) These people will also lump you into a nebulous group of conservative boogeymen, which is where the political angle comes in despite the comment itself having nothing to do with politics. These replies are exactly what is expected though, and only help to further prove the Septum Ring Theory.

In short, Septum Piercing Theory is a comment that's designed to knock a very specific set of chronically online losers down a peg, and it usually works to great effect, almost like a cheat code.
Person A (with septum piercing): Men don't deserve rights/are trash/should be killed, etc, etc.

Person B (Usually a faceless account in Person A's comment section): Septum Ring Theory still undefeated.

Person A (in a video response to the comment): Spoken from a man who's never had his face in between a woman's legs. (They think they ate with this 🤭)
by The Masterful Baiter September 15, 2025
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"Septum Theory" Theory

A dismissive phrase invented as a lazy insult toward women with septum rings. It’s most often used when the person insulting can’t actually respond to what a woman with a septum piercing is saying — so instead of addressing her point, they reduce her to her jewelry.

It’s not really a “theory” at all — it’s a cop-out comeback.

People lean on “Septum Theory” when they’re out of arguments, turning someone’s appearance into the debate itself.
Her: “That’s actually factually incorrect, here’s the source.”

Him: “Uhh… Septum Theory.”

Translation: “I don’t have a real argument, so I’ll just insult your piercing.”

Her: Says anything that goes against men in general

Him: Septum theory strikes again.

Translation: I have no argument.

Aka "Septum Theory" Theory. The theory that men will find anything they can to try an degrade a woman, logical or not.
by txxxxx September 23, 2025
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Septum Piercing

Badass mfers with septum piercings either have a fat cock that all the chicks want or a juicy gorrilla grip pussy that makes the boys go crazy. Most with a septum piercing have probably railed a line of coke off of the back of a toilet in a grimy dive bar stall or the pubic mons of a bad bitch. If youve got a septum piercing you definitely fuck
Male: he got a septum piercing to let people know his cock is fat

Female: she got a septum piercing because she's got a juicy pussy
by Fucking_off May 16, 2025
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Septum piercing theory

It’s that women (maybe men as well?) with septum rings will allow and sometimes demand, that their past trauma or past adversity embody their personality. Self reflectively, they can maintain a state of perpetual victimhood which in turn allows them to maintain a state of constant and “justified” mental turmoil. They’re then allowed to make themselves the center of most conversations by explaining why their past trauma relates to seemingly benign, but ultimately offensive (because of aforementioned trauma) topics, and has led them to no longer have a positive outlook on said topic or in life.
Septum piercing theory checks out for this one.
by Traviswhiskey May 31, 2025
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