old man river

An insult for an elderly male.

"Shut up Old Man River, before I come over there and break your hip!"

by KWB March 14, 2005

old man chan

A weirdo with to much gell in his hair. A middle-aged person going through their mid-life crisis. Typically have no friends and are depressed people. NOT a ladies man. In fact, all girls do their best to avoid him at all costs.

Oh man I wish old man chan wasnt here
Old man Chan has too much gell in his hair

by the=definer+ November 11, 2019

old man strength

the crazy insane strength you gain when you become an old man

did you see grandpa pick up that keg of beer?
Yeah he has sick old man strength

by caliwolves April 9, 2009

old man smell

A smell that often wafts off of old men. It is a medly of Old Spice Aftershave, Brylcreem Hair Slyling Gel and Ben Gay.

The funny thing is that, minus the Ben Gay smell, This was probably a hip and manly smell for the average 20 something guy back in the 50's

Was grandpa just here? I detect some Old man Smell.

by Paul June 25, 2005

old man strength

The uncanny ability of older men to lift copious amounts of lumber, heavy furniture, and beat their sons in arm wrestling.

Man 1: "My dad beat me in arm wrestling again..."
Man 2: "Of course, he has old man strength."

by UIC123 May 9, 2011

Old Man Disease

An abnormal, chronic condition that utterly destroys the spirit of those unfortunate enough to be affected. Victims usually enter an initial phase of existential shock coupled with long bouts of heavy, heavy introspection. Symptoms usually include a decreased will to participate in all social activities, as well as a general lethargic and depressing outlook. This disease is highly infectious and may be transferred merely by word of mouth in fortuitous circumstances. This disease carries no race bias.

Treatment: Direct intervention by loved ones, making significant amounts of money, getting laid.

H: Sup Jones?
J: Oh, hey Haboob.
H: How's it goin?
J: Oh, dude.. I'm super stressed about all this reading I got to get done this week. Plus my arms are super sore from cleaning all those big ass boats all day. I don't even know what I'm doing with my life anymore(patient undergoes period of existential shock).
H: I was not expecting that kind of real shit. So... I guess that means you're not coming out tonight?
J: Nah man, I gotta get my shit together. I'll have like a beer or two... maybe. Hey, maybe you should start thinking about taking school seriously too.
H: ....

1 week later...

L: Sup Haboob?
H: Oh, hey Laz.... How's it goin?
L: Oh life's great man, I got this new job and I'm making good money. Hours are shit but its good. How's yours?
H: Aw, man. I've been studying all week and feel like shit. I feel like I'm getting too old for all this partying (patient undergoes period of existential shock). I gotta make money man, 20 is the new 55. I've been trading bitcoins all week.
L: Oh, shit. Does that mean you're not coming out tonight?
H: I'll come around, maybe have one beer.
L:....

2 weeks later....

P: Yo, Laz! Let's get hanned tonight~
L: Can't man. I'm allergic to beer.
P: Man, this dumbass nigga got the Old Man Disease.

by koolgraps December 4, 2013

Old Man Penis

It's a super flacid penis that seems to never come to life, only with a pill called Viagra.

I wish I could get rid of this old man penis.

by OldManPenis September 25, 2014