How old is your newspaper?

A substitution for ' You are sooo~ left out.", to tell someone that what they were saying was old news.

Henry: "Hey, I heard Mark is going out with Cathy. Is it real?"
Rick: "Dude. How old is your newspaper? That's 3 months ago. He's going out with his side chick Sabrina now."

by hugalahugalalolo777 March 6, 2016

The newspaper boy

When you’re fucking your girl on Sunday so you have to throw the New York Times at her face because you are the fucking mailman. She dies on impact.

I was giving my girl the newspaper boy on Sunday

by 1pseudonym2 May 9, 2019

NEWSPAPER

if you’re here from the shade room yes their definition is true but ain’t nobody got time for that ima still say “paper for the news”

I saw my sister in the newspaper today!

by IlmsmSky September 16, 2019

Newspaper

A newspaper is a rich man's blog

We used to eat our fish and chips off a newspaper until we found out how toxic was the ink

by Option 22 May 22, 2020

NEWSPAPER

Never Eat Wet Soggy Pussy And Poop Especially Rare

Torrey, NEWSPAPER... please, unless you want to.

by Cshady2424 September 22, 2020

Newspaper water

The waste that’s excreted from a news paper after it has been read

Freins:the house is on fire!!!
Me: shut up, theirs newspaper water on the couch.

by Cregthehat June 30, 2021

free newspapers

another word for fire lighting material

He's not burning properly
chuck some more free newspapers on him

by The incredibly smelly jerry September 19, 2003