Jehovah's Witness Apostate

A loving and caring human being worthy of love. Jehovah's Witnesses are taught to shun anyone who leaves the organization or questions the Watchtower's beliefs and doctrines. Jehovah's Witness Apostates are intelligent, talented contributing members of society who are kind to small children and small animals.

Jehovah's Witness Apostate: "Excuse me Ma'am, you dropped your wallet"
Little Old Lady: "Oh thank you dear"

by Beth Shan2 August 26, 2013

Jehovah's stiffness

n. An unwelcome erection which arrives at the most inconvenient times and is hard to get rid of.

E.g. Yo Tony blud, lessons over, lets split.

Tony: Shit! I can't stand up, I got Jehovah's stiffness init!

by swany01 May 14, 2008

Jehovah's Witnesses—Who Are They?

Goto Watchtower.org, JW-Media.org and JW.org to learn more.

Jehovah's Witnesses—Who Are They? They are very misunderstood...They were suffering with the Jews in the Holocaust, but yet they still strive to gain God's approval and love. They do as they are scriptually instructed in showing love towards all and preaching the "Good News" of God's Kingdom.

by DCLBoogie March 19, 2010

one of Jehovah's Witnesses

The grammatically correct singular form of Jehovah's Witnesses.

He is one of Jehovah's Witnesses.

by Downstrike May 18, 2004

JeHobo

The people you see wandering the streets telling you that you need to "be saved by god" or "You're going to hell." A Step above a regular Jehovah's Witness because these people practically live on the street. They even look ragged. Watch out for the JeHobo's (Witnesses)

*While Driving, a JeHobo approaches vehicle at stoplight*
No mr. JeHobo, I do not want to be saved by your god. Now please take a bath and have a nice day

by ProfSage91 August 4, 2011

Jehovas witness protection program

The non-existent government program we wish we were in when you know who comes knocking.

{Ding-Dong}
(Troy) Ah man... (Carl) What? What is it?

(Troy) Just those pesky Jay Dubz.
(Carl) Man, you should get in the Jehovas witness protection program.

by Cat Narsh May 17, 2011

jehovahs witnesses

jehovahs witnesses- beliefs-jesus came to earth to offer his life up as a ransom sacrifice to free us from sin and death.at armagedon all the wicked will be destroyed. on judgement day(1000 years) there will be a resurection of righteous and unrighteous, the earth will be broughtback to a paradise like state, humans will grow to perfection and live forever, and only 144000 will go to heaven and rule with jesus. Basically they live their lives by the bible and try to do everything by bible standards- they dont smoke swear get drunk etc simply because the bible says not to. they go witnessing door to door because jesus said it would have to be done just as he did, and because of thee preaching work they would be persecuted.they want to let people know about the end of this system of things and gods kingdom because they are compelled by love.

i am one of jehovahs witnesses im a teen but i know its the truth, not just because my parents believe and have told me it is-but because i can see it myself. all you have to do is read the bible-put 2 and 2 together- and see that they are doing everything the bible says(well except the stuff that doesnt apply because it was only for the israelites to do etc) its a shame they are hated because they are lovely people, but hey, jesus said it would happen-cause it happened to him-and he was gods son!

Person 1-yeah,im studying with jehovahs witnesses.
Person 2-cool.

by dunno:) January 7, 2010