João

litteraly the best brazillian wonder kid on earth like he’s even the best wonder kid ever he plays for watford like best watford player ever gonna get em promoted n shit and a joao is like what u call someone that’s cool.

although when you call someone a joao it can be referred to being called a nonce ngl

example 1 for normal: hey look that guy has a big shlong it must be João

Example 2 for nonce: Hey g, look over there it’s a joao tappin a 15 year old

by JoãoPedro10 April 3, 2021

Stor João

Stir Joao define um estado de espírito, serenidade, sabedoria, elegância e por vezes maternidade

“Stor João dê me um nite”

“Senhor doutor Doutor João estamos à sua espera no faz falta”

by chiquinha May 19, 2025

João

If you have a João you have almost everything.

He's a loyal compassionate companion for life.

You should never betray Joao's trust, for it may wound him in many ways.

If you are Joao's girlfriend, keep in mind that you will live a comfortable humble life.

If your name is Raquel, please ignore the text above. You'll do anything you want... And everything will be fine.

João, que faz esta roupa em cima do sofá?

by John Snows November 23, 2021

João De Jesus

João De Jesus is the most amazing person you'll ever meet, when he comes into your life he will be ur highest point and only take you higher. He has a 11 incher and going strong, He's caring and the sweetestperson you'll ever meet, curious about the world and all the cultures and histories and fucken smexxxxy in a hoodie. Has multiple pink florida shorts and even though he acts gay and retared he isn't ( the game part), he loles to work on himslef and fet better and gives back to the community, may or may not be racists, he comforts well and is understanding

He has a beautiful soul and a beautiful at of seeing life and will open u up so many new experiences, he will be the best thing that will ever happen to you.

Jack : " if João De Jesus was gay id hit that"
Bob : " nah he's just a little dyslexic, but he's the best person you'll ever know"

by He's my world March 27, 2024

João

João is the ultimate hot guy, he won the genetic lottery and has a sex appeal that few can be proud to say the same, heartbreaker since birth, usually can get every girl he wants and takes pride on it, he’s very blunt and straightforward and is used to use flattery to get what he wants as he’s so charming. He’s a natural leader and can be the most amazing person you ever met either in friendships and romantic relationships or the worst if you make the mistake to make it between him and what he wants. He can act like a douchebag in such situations but he quickly regrets it as he’s also the sweetest human being on earth.
Women have a love-hate relationship with him but love usually prevails

Girl 1 to her friend: “Wow look at João, I would make anything to have him “ *proceeds to get naked*
Girl 2: I don’t like him he’s too cocky look at way he walks , I think he’s an idiot
Girl 1: I think we’re not talking about the same guy, he was so sweet to me the other day

Girl 2: Omg he talked to you??? Lucky girl

by CherHorowitz123 November 21, 2021

João

Synonym for cocksucker

I saw an adult movie where they did a lot of João

by Rei Panadão November 22, 2021

João Batista

A typical Braz-.. British name, normally referring to a male João Batista's like to watch anime and like top of the curve girls. they typically have curly hair and a attractive little sister

Person A : you know who João Batista is?

Person B: Yes João Batista loves Omori

by HypperAstro November 5, 2022