dutch hemorrhoid

When you give someone's asshole a noogie till they get a hemorrhoid.

If we can't do anal I'm given you a Dutch hemorrhoid.

by Luster2411 January 13, 2014

hemorrhoid hockey

Eating ass

My boyfriend was playing hemorrhoid hockey with me last night.

by Buffboibert March 10, 2023

Hemorrhoid Humper

I giant pain in you ass

The IRS sent in their team of Hemorrhoid Humper's to check our books.

by jerk store June 21, 2016

walking hemorrhoid

A person that's a major pain in the ass!

Man, She's so bitchy! She A walking hemorrhoids.

by Lord-Pain March 28, 2015

brain hemorrhoid

Like a brain hemorrhage only this leaves the person's head full of shit.

David: "Did you hear some of Clint's ideas at the seminar last night?"

Craig: "Yup. Pretty obvious he suffered another brain hemorrhoid."

by BuffDudeTotally April 16, 2014

hemorrhoid tourniquet

Hemorrhoid tourniquet: trying on thong underwear and getting your hemorrhoids caught in the floss when you pull them off.

During some man-talk over beers, one of the guys explained how he tried on his girlfriend's thong during a hemorrhoid flare-up and it got really squeezed as he took them off. His beer buddy didn't miss a beat as he explained "No Pain, No Gain" and confirmed that hemorrhoid tourniquets like that were coming into vogue at old man frat parties.

by benighse November 22, 2009

Hemorrhoid Police

An over the top, overly aggressive, politically correct in every which way conceivable Human Resources Department that snuffs the heart and soul out of a company.

Bob - Crap, I'm being summoned by the Hemorrhoid Police...

Peter - What'd ya do?

Bob - Ya know that joke the other day about Romney and his magic underwear that showed up in my eMail? Someone looked at it over my shoulder then ratted me out to HR...

by bullharbour November 10, 2012