i am confusion

A phrase saying that you are confused used in a simi popular internet meme.

(Hears a confusing theory on 9/11) . I am confusion.

by Sober calvin February 26, 2017

confusion deathmonkey

1. a delusional and fictitious creature that enjoys playing with explosives and wandering around aimlessly in a hallucinogenic state.

2. a popular podcast recorded and produced in Kansas City, MO, by three guys who have a lot of free time and a lot to scream at each other about.

I used to listen to the morning radio show on the way to work, but now I listen to Confusion DeathMonkey radio.

by wbcjshi February 3, 2010

Drunk confession

When you call the person you like drunk to tell them.
Sometimes it will work out for you and the person will like you back. Othertimes it will be the most embarrassing phone call you ever made. Drunk confession can lead to new relationships, or a huge heart ache and constant taunting from your friends.

*ring ring ring*
Boy: Hello?
Girl: *insert boy name*!
Boy: *insert girl name*?
Girl: I love you
Boy:.....
Girl: I Love you soo much!!

Girl 2: WHAT ARE YOU DOING PUT THAT PHONE DOWN!
*Hangs up girls phone*

Girl 2: Do you know what you did last night?
Girl: No?
Girl 2: You did a Drunk confession of you love for *insert Boy's name here*

by mcswimgirl August 2, 2012

vegan conversion ceremony

This is when one person has chosen the noble and delicious path of veganism for themselves, but refuses to keep this amazing secret to themselves and thrusts their food choices on others whenever they have a captive audience, such as when you are invited to their home for a meal or even a special event. The masterstroke is when you offer to bring non-vegan food so that 100% of the other people attending can have a choice, the vegan's conversion ceremony will not be disrupted, so there shall be no non-vegan food welcomed at all. The double masterstroke is when you ask "what can I bring?", the answer is a vegan dessert, even though you could not possibly bring your favorite vegan dessert from any familiar place since you have never ordered a vegan dessert in your life!

When you arrive, the noble vegan will use familiar words, such as butter, cheese, meatloaf, chicken; no they are not taunting you. None of these items are anywhere in sight and none will be served. Your host may be performing a "vegan conversion ceremony".

I just attended a vegan conversion ceremony on Thanksgiving where the vegan host repeatedly extolled the virtues and joys of being vegan, while not permitting any non vegan food in the home (despite non vegan food being permitted on any other day), where they served only meat, butter, and cheese replacements to a room full of known and committed carnivores.

by footrageous November 30, 2021

Confusion Boner

1) When a situation or scenario creates a state of arousal contrary to the normal tendencies of the one becoming aroused, thus also creating a situation of sexual confusion.

2) When something that should not be considered arousing actually creates arousal.

3) When one is not sure if something is sexually appealing or not.

Is this sexy? Because it's giving me a total confusion boner right now...

by thatthingoverthere June 5, 2011

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader.

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time - something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man.

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time - something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man.

by biggestbafoonbingus69 June 4, 2023

mass confusion

Father's Day in the ghetto.

LBJ's "War on Poverty" was a $5,000,000,000,000.00 boondoggle that destroys black families to this very day.

Maury: "In our seemingly endless series on mass confusion, Boomsheeka 'Miss Thang' Chickenheader is about to find out the results of her 87th paternity test."

Boomsheeka: "This is gonna be the one Maury; I am sure this time. D'tronne is definitely the father."

Maury: (thinking to himself that he needs to get a REAL job) "D'tronne... is NOT the father!"

Boomsheeka: "Aiiiyeeeee!" (runs backsatge and slides down wall)

by One Stark Reality May 17, 2008