Parents whose tyranny compels you to define them in the virtual world because they define you in the real world.
by TheDefined February 08, 2013
1.
Asshole dad: YOU MUST GET HAIRCUT TODAY NOW! YOU HAIR TOO LONG! SO UGLY!
Me: Why can't I look the way I want?
Dad: YOU LOOK LIKE GIRL! DO YOU WANT PEOPLE THINK YOU GIRL?!!?!??!?!?!
Me: How is 3 inch long hair girly?
Dad: NO MATTER WHAT, YOU MUST GET HAIRCUT TODAY! OR I TAKE YOU LAPTOP AWAY!
Me: ... *gets a lopsided haircut that makes me look like a fucking nerd. Asian parents fail. *
2.
Faghead dad: Did you do your homework today?
Me: Yeah
Dad: did you do your homework today?
Me: Yes.
Dad: did you do your homework today?
Me: YES!!!
Dad: WHY YOU YELL? YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO YELL AT ME!
Me: Well obviously you couldn't hear me so I had to yell
Dad: SHUT UP!!!
Me: Fine...
Dad: YOU ARE THE STUPIDEST KID EVER. *beats*
3.
This is a true story. I was in 4th grade, and my mom was trying to teach me how to add fractions. I didn't get it at the time, and here's what happened:
Mom: Do #1
Me: *does it, gets it wrong*
Mom: WRONG! HOW YOU FORGET? DO THE COMMON DENOMINATOR!
Me: I'm trying!
Mom: WATCH!!! *does problem, expects me to magically know how to do it* Now do #2
Me: *still doesn't get it, gets it wrong*
Mom: STUPID! DO THE COMMON DENOMINATOR! *bitch slaps*
Me: *sobbing* I don't know how!
Mom: *angrily does the problem, and breaks the pencil in the middle* SHARPEN IT!
Me: *sharpens*
Mom: Now do #3!
Me: *gets it wrong. How does she expect me to learn this stuff in a day as a 4th grader?*
Mom: YOU ARE THE MOST STUPIDEST KID IN THE WORLD! *goes in a bitch slapping and punching frenzy*
Me: *ends up with lots of bruises*
4.
Fucktard dad: *watching '24' with me* This is the stupidest show ever. All it does is label chinese people as bad guys
Me: ... There are american terrorists too...
Dad: This is the most unrealistic stuff ever. Bullshit. How does jack survive everything?
Me: How come martial artists in chinese movies can fly? Unrealistic much?
Dad: Shut up
Asshole dad: YOU MUST GET HAIRCUT TODAY NOW! YOU HAIR TOO LONG! SO UGLY!
Me: Why can't I look the way I want?
Dad: YOU LOOK LIKE GIRL! DO YOU WANT PEOPLE THINK YOU GIRL?!!?!??!?!?!
Me: How is 3 inch long hair girly?
Dad: NO MATTER WHAT, YOU MUST GET HAIRCUT TODAY! OR I TAKE YOU LAPTOP AWAY!
Me: ... *gets a lopsided haircut that makes me look like a fucking nerd. Asian parents fail. *
2.
Faghead dad: Did you do your homework today?
Me: Yeah
Dad: did you do your homework today?
Me: Yes.
Dad: did you do your homework today?
Me: YES!!!
Dad: WHY YOU YELL? YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO YELL AT ME!
Me: Well obviously you couldn't hear me so I had to yell
Dad: SHUT UP!!!
Me: Fine...
Dad: YOU ARE THE STUPIDEST KID EVER. *beats*
3.
This is a true story. I was in 4th grade, and my mom was trying to teach me how to add fractions. I didn't get it at the time, and here's what happened:
Mom: Do #1
Me: *does it, gets it wrong*
Mom: WRONG! HOW YOU FORGET? DO THE COMMON DENOMINATOR!
Me: I'm trying!
Mom: WATCH!!! *does problem, expects me to magically know how to do it* Now do #2
Me: *still doesn't get it, gets it wrong*
Mom: STUPID! DO THE COMMON DENOMINATOR! *bitch slaps*
Me: *sobbing* I don't know how!
Mom: *angrily does the problem, and breaks the pencil in the middle* SHARPEN IT!
Me: *sharpens*
Mom: Now do #3!
Me: *gets it wrong. How does she expect me to learn this stuff in a day as a 4th grader?*
Mom: YOU ARE THE MOST STUPIDEST KID IN THE WORLD! *goes in a bitch slapping and punching frenzy*
Me: *ends up with lots of bruises*
4.
Fucktard dad: *watching '24' with me* This is the stupidest show ever. All it does is label chinese people as bad guys
Me: ... There are american terrorists too...
Dad: This is the most unrealistic stuff ever. Bullshit. How does jack survive everything?
Me: How come martial artists in chinese movies can fly? Unrealistic much?
Dad: Shut up
by iHateAsianParentss April 19, 2009
Typical Grading System according to Asian Parents:
A = Almost Good Enough
B = Beating
C = Cry In A Corner
D = Death
E = Excruciating Death
F = F***ing Excruciating Death
A = Almost Good Enough
B = Beating
C = Cry In A Corner
D = Death
E = Excruciating Death
F = F***ing Excruciating Death
Me: I got 200% on my test just like you wanted!
Asian Parents: 200%?! Why no 400%?
Me: But the maximum was 200%—
Asian Parents: NO EXCUSE FOR FAILURE!!! YOU GROUNDED!!!
Asian Parents: 200%?! Why no 400%?
Me: But the maximum was 200%—
Asian Parents: NO EXCUSE FOR FAILURE!!! YOU GROUNDED!!!
by SevenFootRatsRatsAlongHisRats August 21, 2022
Asian parents consume themselves with getting their child into an Ivy League, compare their child to other children, and/or act strictly toward their children. For example, asian parents typically sign their children up for summer school without their child's knowledge or consent, only to tell their children the day before that they must attend the summer school that they were signed up for. They are characterized but not limited to parents of asian descent.
Scott: "Sorry I could not see that movie yesterday. My parents made me stay home because they were scared I was going to party too much. Instead, they made me stay home and work on my Harvard application for eight hours."
Jeff: "Wow. Too bad you have asian parents. We had a great time yesterday."
Jeff: "Wow. Too bad you have asian parents. We had a great time yesterday."
by nauyknt August 06, 2005
if you don't respect them you get shout at but not white americans or other race
they slap you or punish you if you get bad grades
they want you to be a doctor
something every asian kid has to go through in there life
but asia makes better food them america(true)
they slap you or punish you if you get bad grades
they want you to be a doctor
something every asian kid has to go through in there life
but asia makes better food them america(true)
by Subscribe to sushi4u2 October 11, 2017
Most Asian parents rule over their children with a harsh belief: education dominates everything. They will push aside your social life and get rid of your emotions if it means getting straight A's. Asian parents will think of the worst possible scenario and determine what to do based on it. Here's what to expect if you live in an Asian household.....
*Rice, rice, and more rice
*Nothing but water
*Education > life itself
*A - the only acceptable grade
B - they will scream and hit you
C - they will seriously abuse you and hurt you bad
D or lower - kicked out or threatened to death
*They don't care for your looks, all they want is short hair
*No boyfriends/girlfriends
*Will not let you go out late
*9 PM - 10 PM bedtime
*They will make you study no matter what
All in all, they are just trying to protect and raise you, believe it or not. Don't blame the parents, blame the way they were raised. I'm Asian and I remained sane due to pure determination. The only thing you can do is put up with it. You can't change them, it's just the way it is. You'll just have to see that they want you to be successful. While it might be cruel, it's what they believe is the best way to make you a successful person. You will want to hate them a lot, but keep your head up high and you'll make it.
*Rice, rice, and more rice
*Nothing but water
*Education > life itself
*A - the only acceptable grade
B - they will scream and hit you
C - they will seriously abuse you and hurt you bad
D or lower - kicked out or threatened to death
*They don't care for your looks, all they want is short hair
*No boyfriends/girlfriends
*Will not let you go out late
*9 PM - 10 PM bedtime
*They will make you study no matter what
All in all, they are just trying to protect and raise you, believe it or not. Don't blame the parents, blame the way they were raised. I'm Asian and I remained sane due to pure determination. The only thing you can do is put up with it. You can't change them, it's just the way it is. You'll just have to see that they want you to be successful. While it might be cruel, it's what they believe is the best way to make you a successful person. You will want to hate them a lot, but keep your head up high and you'll make it.
Typical Asian parents.....
Dad: GO STUDY NOW!!!
Me: Wait, what did I do?
Dad: GO OR GET OUT!!!
Me: Alright, I'll go study.
Dad: DON'T TALK BACK!!!
Mom: GO GET A HAIRCUT!!!
Me: What? Why? It's not that long
Mom: DON'T TALK BACK TO ME!!!
*drags you off to get a bowl cut or a buzz cut
Dad: GO STUDY NOW!!!
Me: Wait, what did I do?
Dad: GO OR GET OUT!!!
Me: Alright, I'll go study.
Dad: DON'T TALK BACK!!!
Mom: GO GET A HAIRCUT!!!
Me: What? Why? It's not that long
Mom: DON'T TALK BACK TO ME!!!
*drags you off to get a bowl cut or a buzz cut
by DracoUltima September 03, 2012
Something that acutally describes what it's like having Asian parents: FML
You get compared and their excuse is that they're not comparing you to other people. They're 'telling you about the good qualities of that person that you should learn from.'
Oh, and an 'A' is known as 'Average' to Asian parents so getting anything below an 'A' pretty much means death and purely death.
Good luck and hope you survive
You get compared and their excuse is that they're not comparing you to other people. They're 'telling you about the good qualities of that person that you should learn from.'
Oh, and an 'A' is known as 'Average' to Asian parents so getting anything below an 'A' pretty much means death and purely death.
Good luck and hope you survive
Me on my phone for an hour
My Asian parents: Stop being so obsessed with your phone! Go and learn something new. All you do is stay on that stupid phone of yours. If you get on your phone next time, I'm going to take it.
Me: *under my breath* FML
My parents: WhAt DiD yOu SaY? *starts with a 2 hour long lecture starting from respect and ending with how technology ruined this generation*
My Asian parents: Stop being so obsessed with your phone! Go and learn something new. All you do is stay on that stupid phone of yours. If you get on your phone next time, I'm going to take it.
Me: *under my breath* FML
My parents: WhAt DiD yOu SaY? *starts with a 2 hour long lecture starting from respect and ending with how technology ruined this generation*
by Average Asian Child September 17, 2020