Cunt Bagel

When you take two halves of a bagel, put one side over a girls asshole and the other over her vagina, then proceed to eat through the bagel and eat her out. Optionally, you could eat her out through the hole of the bagel if you don't want to eat the bagel half.

Bruh I tried to make a cunt bagel out of Becky but she didn't want anything but a dick near her cunt.

by DefectiveFish May 21, 2017

Bagel Jizz

when the cream cheese from the bagel you are eating gets in the corners of your mouth

co-worker: "You got some bagel jizz on your face"

by kopask January 18, 2015

Spatch-bagel

A person who is weird or creepy. This kind of person is usually avoided by the general public.

Girl 1:"Hey why don't you dance with matt?"
Girl 2: "Psh hellna he's such a spatch-bagel. He comments all my pictures on myspace and i barely know him!"

The Spatch-bagel sat at home and played pokemon by himself...all day

by Drippy MC August 25, 2008

dirt bagel

When you put butter or cream cheese on someone's butt hole before licking it.

She's so hot id give her a dirt bagel.

by Tommytwo40 March 23, 2016

Bagel sweats

After having a large, filling bagel, you feel so full and out of shape that you start to reevaluate your breakfast choice.

*leaving a bakery*
Jackson: Holy crap do I have the bagel sweats. Crank the A/C!

by Emleh June 5, 2015

suck a bagel

A predominantly Southern Minnesotan term, used around the twin cities suburban area. Meaning the same as "Suck my dick" or other similar phrases.

Andy: I definitely cheated off of your test answers man
Noah: Go suck a bagel, Andy

by klausjoneshasappeared April 27, 2019

bagel seeds

A bagel seed is small cheerio shaped oat that is good for the heart.

guy: boi gimme sum o dose bagl seadz
guy: mmm yumi bagel seeds

by bagelseedboi October 22, 2019