Jared

The epitome of laziness. Loves to fondle cats and touch their privates. When attacking a Jared, do not go for the head, because it is metal plated, you won’t phase him. Typically looks like they’re lost and walking in circles, but don’t interrupt them, this is how they think, and disturbing them could ruin their entire day.

Stop being a Jared.

by NickyRen October 18, 2022

Jared

Ah Jared, what name, the ugliest of them all. The name of a guy who is self centered, ignorant, pitiful, lonely, kind of fucking stupid, apathetic, disloyal, bad boyfriend, most hypocritical guy you will ever meet!

Ugh Jared, no I don’t want you to finger me in the Jasons deli parking lot!

by pineappleexpress333 October 23, 2022

Jared

Jared! He's the homeless guy next door. He likes snails a lot and... That's it just snails. He also works for Walter because he wants to go to college, but let's be honest he's 23 and is never gonna get in college. Either way he's still determined to go to college, he also really likes his boss Walter for some reason.

El caca: Hey, look! It's Jared!
Walter: Look it's a homosexual!

by ELCACAISAPIECEOFSHIT October 24, 2022

Jared

Jared, the nephew of el caca.
Asking him for fucking money all the time.
Works at evil persons inc.
For some reason likes pizza Hawaii

Walter: JARED I WANT MY COFFEE
jared: here you go.
Walter:JARED YOU DUMB FUCK YOU MESSED UP BADLY

by Le chat sexy October 24, 2022

Jared

A guy that gets absolutely no maidens. No bitches. No damsels. No female significant other. Or male significant other, for that matter. He gets nobody. He is alone, and will forever be alone. He loves Friday Night Funkin' and anime, and watches them nonstop.
Hopefully, someday, he will find that special someone.

*at a party*
"Yo you seen my boy Jared?"
"Nah he's at home playin FNF."
"Damn that's too bad."

by Drexsanity November 4, 2022

jared

jared is typically a very popular person and he loves people that same way he loves himself and there is no one quiet like jared. they can be funny and love to take a joke, however sometimes these ‘jokes’ may go too far and jared doesn’t always know when he has gone too far

jared is the class clown but a popular one

by tate and violet stan January 4, 2023

Jared

A raging homosexual who hates fun

Person 1: man this "Jared" guy is such a rat he hates fun and just makes gay jokes

by GFreem February 9, 2023