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taint welding

To reach a point of stress, anticipation, or engaging an act that is so extreme that you clench the cheeks of your buttocks together so tightly, that your taint is effectively welded together.
John was driving so recklessly that Steve was taint welding in the passenger's seat
by TK42FUN May 4, 2015
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Taint Shelf

The tiny, almost useless, passenger accommodation on most modern sportsbikes. Often referred to as a “pillion”, this small, hard cushion has the effect of bludgeoning the area between the passenger’s genitals and anus throughout the ride. Because of its height relative to the driver and generally awkward seating position, these seats have a reputation for deterring passengers from wanting to ride along. These seats are a characteristic of the split tail style of motorcycles, opposed to the conventional “banana” seat (single piece) design. The prevalence of this pragmatically useless design can be attributed to the greatly improved aesthetics and improved control of the motorcycle while in full tuck, as the driver can scoot back into the shelf to secure themselves from sliding further rearward.
“Dude, do you remember having to ride bitch on my Zx10r?”
“Yeah bra, my ass still huts from that retarded taint shelf…”
by Thirdgengearhead May 12, 2015
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suck taint

A term used in order to tell someone to fuck off or to say suck my dick, usually in a situation where the person you say it to is making no sense or they're an idiot
OP:" Where are we?"
Victim: " Goodhue County one Goodhue County nine"
OP: "Suck taint! That's not helpful"
by QuebxcOnVocab July 23, 2020
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Tainted Meat

When a girl (eg. Caitlin) is ragged about by a famous rapper (eg. Big T) she is then tainted and no men would want to enter her cave of doom.
Nah mate her batty stinks she’s also tainted meat due to getting a big Blackpool slong inside her.
by PadddeeTheNonce February 29, 2020
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Taint balls

Anal sex when the guys balls slap up against her taint and his taint.
Rick: Dude, I had such taint balls after giving Susie anal.
by Zipola August 11, 2018
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Taint salad

The gusset of your underwear. The part that goes up the middle of your crotch.
Man, my chub rub has my taint salad so sweaty.
by Tunnel twins August 19, 2023
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tainted berserker

A relative of the dingleberry, the tainted berserker is a fierce fleck of fecal matter that has invaded upon the grundle region (tainted) as a result of a particularly violent, berserker-style bowel movement.
Strauss invoked the power of Odin upon the porcelain throne of Assgard, thus requiring copious amounts of toilet paper to ensure that no tainted berserkers were creeping up on his family jewels.
by Caible October 10, 2013
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