taint stew

When your dick and balls are sweating hard as fuck so your taint is sweating as well, thus begins a mix to create a stew like brew that smells of old sweaty gym socks, sweaty earring backs, and sweaty testicles.

"Bruh I got the meanest taint stew brewing right now, my balls are sweaty as hell."

by 12Soft June 15, 2014

slappy taint

The moist, fat undercarriage of a saggy old woman that slaps against itself during any form of movement

I love eating ham and mustard out of a slappy taint.

by lookatthatfucktard January 23, 2015

taint tingler

When you wipe your ass and the toilet paper stacks up so high that it tickles your ass and balls when you flush

That shit I just took was a taint tingler

by johnnydigher April 7, 2015

taint welding

To reach a point of stress, anticipation, or engaging an act that is so extreme that you clench the cheeks of your buttocks together so tightly, that your taint is effectively welded together.

John was driving so recklessly that Steve was taint welding in the passenger's seat

by TK42FUN May 4, 2015

Taint Shelf

The tiny, almost useless, passenger accommodation on most modern sportsbikes. Often referred to as a “pillion”, this small, hard cushion has the effect of bludgeoning the area between the passenger’s genitals and anus throughout the ride. Because of its height relative to the driver and generally awkward seating position, these seats have a reputation for deterring passengers from wanting to ride along. These seats are a characteristic of the split tail style of motorcycles, opposed to the conventional “banana” seat (single piece) design. The prevalence of this pragmatically useless design can be attributed to the greatly improved aesthetics and improved control of the motorcycle while in full tuck, as the driver can scoot back into the shelf to secure themselves from sliding further rearward.

“Dude, do you remember having to ride bitch on my Zx10r?”
“Yeah bra, my ass still huts from that retarded taint shelf…”

by Thirdgengearhead May 12, 2015

taint fracking

When you have intercourse with a woman by using your penis to drill a hole in between her vagina and anus.

I was so tired of plain old anal with her, so we explored some untapped taint fracking opportunities.

by Phil Nagi November 23, 2016

Taint Splitter

When you drop a turd that’s so hard, so long and so girthy you feel like your taint is being slowly split in half as the behemoth passes.

From the moans coming from the stall next to mine, I’m pretty that guy was forcing out a taint splitter.

Hey braaaaaahhh I’m really hurting. I just has a taint splitter. Will you do a brooohhh a solid and take a gander at my taint and make sure it’s not bleeding?

I’m going to have to take a laxative. I can’t take anymore taint splitters.

by Eaton Holgoode October 16, 2018