dark lord jesus

When Jesus decides to pull a Morgan freeman So he can fuck black bitches

john: Man Dark lord Jesus sure is one for them black bitches

by I_No_Gay_Boi December 1, 2017

beans rice jesus christ and byrin

Beans rice Jesus Christ and byrin🥴

Who are you thankful for this thanks giving? Beans rice Jesus Christ and Byrin 🥴, who? ByRin, WHO? BYRIN

by xxlilron November 30, 2021

magnus erickson alexanderson the divine jesus chair

He was born out of the Scandinavian god Odin's rectum on October 9, 1944 (Leif Eriksson Day) due to a wolf-styled anal plug. Later killed in an accident involving poisonous blowfish innards, he was then reborn through a cake recipe in which the blond-haired baker didn't do the cooking by the book. However the oven was built into the volcano Eyjafjallajokull, and he was blown into a bush at a park in Nevada (after Iceland's banking crisis). There, he was discovered by Funion-eating Americans, whom adopted him as their love child. He currently resides with bitch-ass white kids and drug-dealing draugr, leaded by a half-Asian named Fuzzy Sheiben. Please subscriebe and donate nao so he can fulfill his dream of meeting Alexander Rybak. Join the Felowship of Magnus Followers who partake in the journey to his birthplace in Iceland.

ALL HAIL MAGNUS ERICKSON ALEXANDERSON THE DIVINE JESUS CHAIR

by planttreesplease January 24, 2015

JESUS CHRIST ITS A LION GET IN THE CAR

>:3
Jesus Christ its a lion, get in the car!

Jesus Christ its a lion get in the car

by Ben Tricarico May 14, 2008

You need Jesus!

Its the act of telling someone they need a whole lotta help; referring to people who are way past the point of return

Bethany: I have a foot fetish
Mike: You need Jesus!
Bethany: OMG I know

by realniQQa143 May 27, 2016

Jesus Christ and a half

Sometimes saying Jesus Christ just isn't enough...

Guy #1: Homie... you got a buck or two I can borrow?

Guy #2: Jesus Christ and a half, Carlo! How many times do I have to fucking tell you? I'm done lending you prostitute money.

by reid_o April 5, 2009

Jesus Chicken

The slang term for a chain of fast-food restaurants called Chik-Fil-A. Usually used in a derogatory term to refer to their strongly Christian policies (being closed on Sundays explicitly for their employees to attend church), anti-gay policies and extremely large financial contributions to anti-gay-rights bills and amendments, both of which stem from the owners' interpretations of their denomination of the Christian bible.

I'm hungry, wanna go get some Jesus Chicken?

by Joreth November 16, 2011