The Pirate Cowboy Astronaut Theorem

The theory that all male-identifying individuals can be categorized as either a pirate, a cowboy, or an astronaut. Some combination thereof is a possibility, but one classification is always dominant. The categories need no defined criteria because the correct placement is almost always surprisingly obvious.

"I really like him, which is surprising because based on The Pirate Cowboy Astronaut Theorem he's more of an astronaut, and I'm usually more attracted to pirate men."
"I get that. I'm mostly into cowboys at the moment, but I could definitely see myself settling down with an astronaut one day."

by hannahmadison69 January 19, 2024

Grumulum's Theorem

When you don't know what you're doing, but you get it right anyway.

A: How did you get the correct answer on this test when you're failing the class?
B: I just used Grumulum's Theorem.

by RealCraigles January 25, 2024

Invisible string theory

The theory that everyone, everywhere, in the world is somehow connected by an “invisible string”, particularly lovers.

This theory is inspired by the Taylor Swift song “invisible string”, in which she describes the ways her and her lover were connected before they even met.

Person A: I found my current boyfriend in the background of one of the photos I took in 2013!
Person B: Wow! What a coincidence!
Person C: Actually, that’s the invisible string theory. Y’all are soulmates

by Jessienewyorknanny January 26, 2024

The $15 Theory

The theory that charging your friends $15 to hangout with you is moral and socially acceptable.

Often the theory is used when you irresponsibly buy something unreasonably expensive, then find an excuse to make your friends pay for it through indirectly using it.

"Hey guys, I bought this new console, so every time you guys come hangout and use it, I'll need you to pay $15. It's only fair!"
"I know you're spending the night, so have you ever heard of the $15 theory? Yeah, I'll need you to pay me $15 to sleep on my new couch."

by Dr15$ November 12, 2023

orange peel theory

"It's the idea that someone cares enough for you to do the most minuscule act of service, although you can do it yourself."

the idea that sometimes we do seemingly small things for others in order to be connected to them.

"i know you can peel this orange on your own but i want to do it for you! just to make it easier! to me it's like another way of communicating love." -orange peel theory

by kk_bandit November 15, 2023

the olive theory

so basically, it referes to the theory from how i met your mother which says that the potential of a relationship is determined by whether one person in the relationship loves olives while the other one don't. In this case, the one who hates olives gave them to the other so they completed eachother. But the theory is not just about opposing points fitting well together : the most important thing is about willing to sacrifice something you love, to give it to the other.

Ted Mosby, HIMYM : The olive theory is based on my friends Marshall and Lily : he hates olive, she loves them. In a weird way, that's what makes them such a great couple.

Later, Marshall actually admitted that he liked olives but gave them to Lily because she loves olives more

by legend-wait for it...-DARY November 17, 2023

The Hitler Theorem

The Hitler Theorem is in relation to how a stimulus affects you negatively day by day more than Adolf Hitler does. If something affects you worse than Adolf Hitler, then The Hitler Theorem can prove objectively that the stimulus is worse than Adolf Hitler.

"I'm tired of all this work my teacher is assigning me! It annoys me more than Adolf Hitler does, therefore according to The Hitler Theorem this homework is worse than Adolf Hitler!"

by Theoremist November 22, 2023